In today's dose of shower-nozzle masturbation fodder, we were having a difficult time deciding whether to showcase these photos from Italian Vanity Fair of Joaquin Phoenix receiving full-body art from one of the Brazilian Rainforest's indigenous Yawanawa tribe, or these greased up stills of Mario Lopez promoting his new fitness book. Both tackle global issues, serve to enlighten, and both are stunningly composed. When it came down to which were more stimulating to feature, however, we decided the shots of Joaquin were preferable for some reason. Maybe because we're not retarded,