Dan Savage Responds to Sword Commenters: “My Husband Is Not Taking Steroids”

Dan Savage chimed in today to respond to The Sword’s earlier post, and pearl-clutching Sword commenters who were characteristically quick to judge his husband Terry, his love of leather, their eschewing of monogamy, and Terry’s fitness as a parent while also being a leather queen. “This is a porn site, right?” he asks.

He has a point, guys!

People were noting the fact that Terry’s gone through quite a body transformation in the last couple of years, with one reader pointing to this 2011 photo that shows Terry with not nearly the enormous guns he now has.

All the working out probably has something to do with Terry’s gig as a swimwear model for Mr. Turk, but that gig only came about after he had gotten in shape — Dan posted a photo of Terry to Instagram wearing a Mr. Turk swimsuit, and the company ended up asking him to be something of their Instagram mascot.

Anyway, Dan insists those glorious muscles are all natural. This is what he had to say:

I don’t usually do this but… my husband does not have anonymous public sex. We are “monogamish,” aka mostly monogamous, more monogamous than not. I was with him at IML. We did not go to the House of Blues party. He is not taking steroids. You can be parents and still have a sex life and not everyone’s sex life is strictly monogamous.

This is a porn site, right?

And here are some photos of Terry in swimwear, which he looks almost as good in as he does in leather.

27 thoughts on “Dan Savage Responds to Sword Commenters: “My Husband Is Not Taking Steroids””

  1. “Monogamish”? Give me a break – if you have sex with people outside your relationship, then you’re not monogamous – it’s pretty simple.

  2. “mostly monogamous” ? Well, il you go from time to time to fuck someone else, then you are not monogamous. Just saying…

  3. Ugh. No judgment, but don’t deny the steroids. Just say nothing rather than lie. There are enough queens you’re talking to with enough experience with various kinds of steroids as well as HGH. That. Body. Is. Not. Natural.

  4. Fuck the haters here. They’re all just jealous of Dan’s ridiculously hot, muscled man, his obviously big cock, and the happy and healthy relationship they have with each other. Dan and Terry, not Dan and Terry’s cock, though I’m sure they have a happy and health relationship too. ;) I’m happy for both of them.

  5. I think he looks good. I wouldn’t say he has the steroid look either, just the look of someone who takes care of their body. Best to them both.

  6. There’s a lot of steroid use/abuse in gay culture, so I’m not surprised that someone thought that.

  7. Could we finally see some tasteful (or not tasteful)nude photos of Terry. Please, please, pretty please.

  8. Oh the irony of gay men being judgmental of other’s sex life on a porn blog.

    And you guys do know there are a lot of excellent supplements on the market now that can help one get their best body WITHOUT steroids, right? #beducatedb4uspeak

  9. I am amused by some of the comments that crop up on here. The disgust that comes across from some commenters in regards to porn stars is hilarious…they do know what kind of site they’re on don’t they?! Does the anger come before or after they’ve whacked one off to them?

    That said, denying his man is on steroids probably comes with an asterisk. That body is on something. It’s an appealing body and I’m sure it takes a lot of work but natural it ain’t. He’s got the HGH look so that’s a possibility. I don’t even care, I have a friend who does it and looks great, but he told me from the start.

  10. Dan — kudos and thank you for the succinct and utter smackdown of the pearl-clutchers (nice turn of word, JW)who seem to find themselves wholly unable to keep themselves from tearing down other people. And, I’ll cosign the idea of a third book.

  11. He makes a pretty reasonable point. For a a porn site the commenter here are pretty uptight. We’re the one’s reading porn news dudes. Let he who is without whatever cast the first thing.

      1. He’s not lying though. Terry should stay out of the sun or get a bronzer. And yes we all get old but most of us are not attention whores who subject themselves to criticism when they posts endless selfies.

  12. I honestly wish Dan and Terry a happy early Fathers’ Day and whoever else is in that relationship. The idea of having non-monogamous parents in an open relationship would be a nightmare for me. To be a good parent, you’ve got to be first a better spouse. Parents obviously should have a sex life if not multiple sex lives. Your sex lives shouldn’t have to compete with the emotional and mental development of your offspring though. More importantly, I’d be rather curious to hear what their adopted straight son would say.

    1. I’m sure DJ’s got some stories to tell. He’ll be turning 18 in about 2yrs, so he’ll be free to say whatever he wants publicly if he so chooses. I honestly think he could write a pretty interesting book on what it’s like growing up having 2 dads. If it’s a positive outcome, it certainly would garner more support for gay couples to be given the right to adopt. In fact, is there a book at all written by someone who grew up with parents of the same sex?

  13. Dan love you and Terry! Read 3 of your books, currently almost finished Skipping Towards Gomorrah. I really think you should consider doing a 3rd book similar to The Kid and The Commitment, like The Teen or something, what your life has been like since last writing The Commitment, what it’s like being gay parents raising a straight teenage boy, or you know something similar of an autobiography. I feel as if The Kid and The Commitment are part of a trilogy and need a 3rd book to complete it. Or perhaps the 3rd book can be co-authored by you and Terry.

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