Our Web Domain Prices, Ourselves

The auction is known as the Internext-Expo, and its catalogue of over 2,000 available domains for sale includes everything from chloroformbitches.com to seepee.com. Bids for most domains start at $1. Some will sell for a lot more. The highest-valued domain by far — with bids starting at $1,000,000 — is nudes.com.

What do the different values of these domains say about the different values in our sexual culture? Fags.com starts at $50,001, but bigfags.com starts at $1. We clearly have a long way to go in embracing those chubby hubbies who need love too.

More surprisingly, handjob.com starts at $250,001, while gayoralsex.com starts at $1. Are handjobs the new oral sex? We already give ourselves a handjob before every meal — until we can suck our own dick too, we’ll pray to God the answer is no.

As for the hot topic of race, it seems that latin dudes are winning. Orientalmen.com, whitegaymen.com and blackdudes.com all start at $1. But latinogayboys.com starts at $10,001. Congrats, papi chulos!

But the most disturbing trend is that love is apparently worth more than sex. Youloveme.com and freelovepersonals.com start at $10,001, and gaydate.com hits 6 digits with a starting value of $100,001. But gayassfucking.com? Letsjustfuck.com? Dirtyasshole.com? That’s right. $1. We fear that all this gay marriage talk is turning our beloved slut culture into a bad romantic comedy.

Objectification is still going strong, though. Manforman.com starts at $1, but dickfordick.com starts at $5,000. Also, it seems that there is as much condom ambivalence among urls as there is among gay guys. Homosexualhealth.com starts at $1, as does gaysbareback.com.

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