If you’ve considered a hiatus from public view after stuffing your face this past week, this might be exactly your excuse to hide out and masturbate before you show your bloated face out on the town again.
Last time we saw this horny chunk of man meat was back in 2011 getting topped by Chris Rockway before he dropped off the face of the planet for a quarter decade (but definitely not from our spank banks).
So, maybe no one cares about Richard’s whereabouts, but we’re interested. Tell us, Richard. What happened in those two and a half years you kept us all in personal purgatory? Any future plans?
We’re guessing he was playing breeder and having babies or something equally as gross.
All we found out in these painful couple dozen months was how much we missed that tingling in our nether parts that only Richard could provide.
Get your lube tubes out, kids.
Hot close-up angle of Richard’s much missed butthole:
We’re into the sneakers, Richard. Hope you took those home with you.