The 20 Most Extremely Important Things You *MUST* Know About Newly Elected Pope Francis From Argentina

76-year-old Jorge Mario Bergoglio is the Argentinian cardinal who was just named Pope. His drag name will be “Francis I,” and here are the 20 most important things you absolutely MUST know about him before you know anything else today.



 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 








 

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20 thoughts on “The 20 Most Extremely Important Things You *MUST* Know About Newly Elected Pope Francis From Argentina”

  1. We all know that he thinks the biggest threat to the Church is
    Monogamous Gays.However he at least appears to be kinder and
    more humble than the last Pope.Should be interesting to see
    how the two of them interact in the future.

  2. I am so happy that you included one of Kevin Falk’s incredible cumshots in these. I would fucking marry that guy if he wasn’t already married to a black woman (according to Colby Keller)

  3. There are an estimated 1.2 billion Roman Catholics in the world, according to Vatican figures (and we thought the 21st century would bring an age of enlightenment … oh well).

    1. That number is definitely an exaggeration. Catholicism have been losing members of their church for quite awhile. Isn’t Muslim the most popular religion at the moment at over 1 billion as well?

      1. it is actually true: the world has approx. 2.2 billion Christians, 1.2 of which are catho.

        It is also true that most catholics are just catholics by name and not in fact (don’t go to mass, don’t get communion, etc.).

  4. Most important things:

    Homophobic.

    Against gay marriage.In Argentina gay marriage is legal.President Cristina Kirchner declared him from Medieval Times.

    He has had a sometimes difficult relationship with President Cristina Fernandez and her late husband and predecessor Nestor Kirchner.

    Francis has spoken out strongly against gay marriage, denouncing it in 2010 as “an attempt to destroy God’s plan”.

    And the most terrifying thing:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/belief/2011/jan/04/argenitina-videla-bergoglio-repentance

    The extent of the church’s complicity in the dark deeds was excellently set out by Horacio Verbitsky, one of Argentina’s most notable journalists, in his book El Silencio (Silence). He recounts how the Argentinian navy with the connivance of Cardinal Jorge Bergoglio, now the Pope, hid from a visiting delegation of the Inter-American Human Rights Commission the dictatorship’s political prisoners. Bergoglio was hiding them in nothing less than his holiday home in an island called El Silencio in the River Plate. The most shaming thing for the church is that in such circumstances Bergoglio’s name was allowed to go forward in the ballot to chose the successor of John Paul II. What scandal would not have ensued if the first pope ever to be elected from the continent of America had been revealed as an accessory to murder and false imprisonment

    1. Well, Adam, with pillars of the gay community like you, who is to stand before the world and proclaim that the newly elected pope is a homophobe because of his gay marriage stance. I mean you and your husband represent the perfect paradigm for modern marriage–roommate fuck-buddies in the swinger lifestyle.

      If you wanna go out and fuck for a living, or be casual about sex in the first place, I’m not sure why a conservative institution like marriage would be appropriate for gays like you anyways. So what do you got to complain about?

    2. I’m a 27 year old argentinian, I was raised catholic, but for some long to explain reasons I lost interest in the whole organized religion system. I’m honestly more concerned about the ridiculous things our president keeps saying than what the new Pope can do. In the end, he’s just the face of an institution that has no power over me, but Cristina Fernandez is a dictator in disguise (apparently “everything she does is legal”). I’m really happy that she supports gay marriage (even if for me any kind of marriage is just a contract), but that’s not enough to make me forget all the things she sold/stole/ruined just to get more power.

  5. I am supremely confused…What was the point of this ? I knew better than to expect anything of relevance but silly me.

    1. The relevance is that the the new pope has no relevance for gay porn models. What is also relevant is that the new pope is 76.

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