This—This—Is The Person You Guys Think Is The Hottest Man On Earth?


“Pavel Patel”? No.

A few of you commented that Pavel Patel, the long lost male Barbie Twin (triplet?) with the sex appeal of an oil slick, is hotter than the true hottest person on Earth I named earlier today.

What. Ever.

Sorry, but muscles and a big dick don’t always guarantee one’s hotness. OK, OK, they always do. But not here. It’s all too synthetic and it’s all too deliberate to be sexy. Also, Peter Cottontail called. He wants his mouth back.

No.

 

39 thoughts on “This—<em>This</em>—Is The Person You Guys Think Is The Hottest Man On Earth?”

    1. In Russia there are no public gay people. Even those who are well known gays are married to women and pretend to be straight.

  1. Different strokes for different folks. I think he’s hot, but then again, I was raised on Long Island, so my taste is dubious.

  2. I can’t believe the people in that bar have a straight face. I’d be on the floor gasping for breath and pissing myself laughing.
    Judging by their “meh, whatever” total lack of interest, a muscle dude in a latex thong wearing riding boots astride a 5ft cock is evidently the norm.

  3. QUICK! Sniff Her Chair While It's Warm

    Baaack in the day when thangs wuz cool…

    Performance art was Karen Finley riding an electro-scooter toilet, shitting on Reagan’s face plastered inside with a giant lighted crucifix mounted to the back of the water tank while singing “Lick It”

    *puff*

  4. I think this Russian guy’s is mainly guilty of OVER GROOMING…and his photographer is mainly guilty of OVER PHOTOSHOPPING and GLAMOUR lighting: All soooooo popular in ‘The Community’. I think he’d probably even look like a man (a pretty dang hot MAN) if PUT DOWN THE DEPILATORY and THE MIRROR…and maybe took up farming, or landscaping for awhile. The other Tumblr Guy just looks like generic 20th x Guerrero ‘GAY HIPSTER DUDE’…cute in a “Bratz” sorta way.

  5. I am not even sure that a big dick is necessary Zach. Marc Dylan has all the muscles in the world, an average to small dick, and he is still beat off to daily. The same is true of Marcus Mojo. They both also look real. The individuals who applaud this whole “avant-garde” thing are missing the point. John Waters is avant-garde because he is naturally quirky and his personality is just “weird”. He is not always trying to say something or make a point, he just is. This guys is looking for attention and so was Sagat and that is why, like Zach, I find him “plastic”. It is very difficult to be truly unique in this world today because we really have seen it all, so “being out there” means more than shock jocking it is also about authenticity.

  6. He’s so hot and Avant Guard – I expect the slack jawed Oakies who write on this blog to completely miss the point. I love men like Pavel and Francois.. perfect balances of so many energies.

  7. “Naked DJ shows are a unique 1.5-hour performance including music and stage numbers. We dress up to Nicki Minaj and Madonna, then start to fight with pillows, change outfits, dance and booty shake. During one show we change into 10 or more outfits, talk with the audience and sing. In one of the numbers I sit onstage half naked in stockings and 20-centimetre heels and I sing Lana Del Rey’s ‘Video Games.’ Can you imagine?”

    Sounds like a swell time… :/

    1. QUICK! Sniff Her Chair While It's Warm

      I sit onstage half naked in stockings and 20-centimetre heels and I sing Lana Del Rey’s ‘Video Games.’ Can you imagine?”

      IF…you do the “hold on a minute, I’m receiving downloads from my home planet” vacant SNL hair sweeps and say “I think my pussy itches…”

      I’d pay a minimum $75 cover and buy a mouse pad stamped with your concert/tour logo.

      1. QUICK! Sniff Her Chair While It's Warm

        By the way, what is Yuri’s Rentboy ID# in Uzbekistan? Can he handle groups cos there’s NO DOUBT, he is a huge bottom.

  8. I don’t mean to say he is the hottest guy on earth. Neither him or that hipster you’re soiling your panties over are the hottest guys on earth. But I do think he’s way hotter than the hipster, although I do like the hipster too.

    He reminds me so much of Francois Sagat and for me that’s what most of the attraction is coming from.

  9. What’s fake about him? He works out, takes care of his body and you can’t fake a good looking dick, you are either born with it or not. And by the way…Frankie is hideous!, looks like a dirty hipster, with piercings and tattoos all over his body that didn’t take effort or a brain. Tattoos are not natural and neither are piercings, so I wonder who is really a fake? And that tattoo on his chest? Reinvent yourself? #fail Keep taking pictures of yourself….

  10. Hey Yall,
    Hes a rad Russian performance artist. The plastic that you see is the point. He’s totally weird and hilarious, and I have in fact been onstage with him while he wore cheerleading pom-poms that were connected to his balls. Amazing.

    Not to mention, the shit he’s doing in Russia right now is VERY brave as the country is incredibly homophobic and a dangerous place for queers.

    Jake

    1. Who are these “queers”?? Cuz I’d wager his parading around in latex bodysuits and stilettos isn’t helping the cause of GAY rights in Russia…

      1. You’d lose that wager. Gay rights in Russia–as they are everywhere else–aren’t won by the conformists to straight culture. Visibility matters

        1. This is a STRAIGHT man “putting on” gender non-conformity in a sad attempt to gain attention (he says he only wears the high-heels when he’s working “to stand out from all the other boys”). What does his visibility have to do with GAY people or GAY rights??

      2. Pressure to be normal has warped you into a sad little mouse who feels a need to shame people who stand out from the crowd. You’re in a very boring safe cage. Please applaud the circus performers, they make life fun.

          1. What are YOU doing to combat Russian homophobia, other than putting down sex workers and erotic performers in Russia? As I said, your’re a lounge chair gay-basher and “concern troll” with no substance but hate for others who stand out from the crowd.

  11. Neither this guy nor the skanky hipster below are my cup of tea. But what’s up with Pavel Patel’s lips in that first pic? He reminds me of those old cartoons where someone accidentally drinks alum.

  12. QUICK! Sniff Her Chair While It's Warm

    I’m out! First, the Jake Genesis thread disappears. Second, we are on to Rod-a-nay Santiago.
    Ululate away!

  13. that is a HOT mess of a fake looking man…there is nothing REAL about him except the fact that he is made of plastic inside and out…

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