Despite hating everything (including myself) so much of the time, I really did have a fun year! And that’s mainly because of you. Thank you for reading, for commenting, for agreeing, and especially for disagreeing. Here are some of the things I wrote about that I liked and some of the things that I typed that I’m not entirely embarrassed of.
On Dawson Riley: “Randy Blue’s Dawson Riley broke up with boyfriend Josh Griffin and “retired” one year ago last month to get married and to raise a baby, but I guess the baby said it was OK for him to do gay porn again, because he’s back.”
On Ethan and Curtis: “Last night, I think I witnessed one of the best gay porn blowjobs I’ve ever seen.”
He’s nice now, see, and he even wrote a book about how everyone else should be nice, too. But why should we have to be perpetually subjected to his endless “take a look at me now” tour? What, we’re supposed to feel better about him as a human being because he’s made amends with Jenifer Aniston? […] Don’t hide behind the internet. Don’t hide behind your blog. Don’t blame the fact that you are/were an asshole on your blog persona! Because if you are an asshole online, you are also a “real life asshole,” too. […] How much feigned atonement masquerading as personal growth and how many more horrifying In Touch Weekly bikini body pics must we endure before we long for the days of the awful, nasty, morbidly obese Perez? I miss that fat piece of shit! At least he was real. Hideous and dull, but real.
On the NOH8 photoshoot at the White Party: “Adam Bouska will be doing one of his NOH8 photo shoots in a hotel, which is perfect for those faggots who like to honor marriage equality and have promiscuous, demoralizing sex all in one weekend. Which photo will be your Facebook profile pic come the Monday after? The one of you with the masking tape over your mouth in a hotel room or the one of you at the NOH8 photo shoot?”
On cowardly Fleshbot bloggers who attack The Sword: “It must be nice to be a blogger on Fleshbot, where after years of posting random XTube videos, fluff pieces filled with misinformation, and “Guys With iPhones” galleries, you can finally Have An Opinion about something (and in the process start a blog war!) and still publish it all under a fun pseudonym like Cedric Dewittison. How…brave.”
You want to fight racism? Start by getting off Grindr and going out into the real world, where actual racism actually exists. Because there’s a difference between “I’m not sexually attracted to black guys” and “I’m not going to hire this black guy because he’s black.” [….] Why should we infringe upon people’s right to free speech? If someone is truly racist, I’d like to know right off the bat. Why dictate what kind of dumb shit they publicly reveal about themselves? Isn’t it better to know—from the beginning—that someone is a racist, or at least an idiot? Isn’t it a good thing that people are allowed to type “no Asian dudes” in their profiles so you know that they are fucking retarded? Oops, sorry, “mentally disabled.”
On gay porn icon Cody Cummings: “As the reigning king of gay porn, Cody has already done it all in his rich catalog of varied performances, so this time around—as the top-billed star of Guys Next Door—he takes it easy and lets the other guys do all the work for a change. As various cast members are permitted to suck on Cody’s nearly fully erect penis, Cody stands there.”
On the death of the gay porn star: “By the time a larger, non-amateur studio signs a popular model to an “exclusive” contract, it’s as unremarkable as it is meaningless. For one, we’ve already seem him working for seven, eight, or thirteen other studios. He can now only work for one company, for six months? Big deal. And that’s assuming the contract is even honored or legitimate in the first place, which they often aren’t. Take Robert Axel, for example, who one week was signed as an exclusive to Falcon Studios and the next week was signed as an exclusive to Cocksure Men. While everyone was writing press releases, Axel was simultaneously filming bareback scenes with senior citizens on amateur sites.”
On Jayden Grey’s haircut and subsequent fallout with Hot House: “Was keeping the fauxhawk worth it? I think so. Because once you show that you’re willing to sacrifice your haircut, what will they ask you to give up next? Your dignity? I support you, Jayden Grey.”
On Out magazine and its obsession with straight people: A group of gay magazine editors canonizing a straight athlete—for what is essentially the act of not being an asshole—by making him pose with his shirt off is as disingenuous as it is pathetic. And while, again, this is also about a troubled media company trying to sell magazines, there’s something especially disgusting about that company taking an issue as important and emotionally significant as gay rights and tying it to a bunch of shirtless straight guys.
The only thing left resembling culture anymore is fighting on the internet, right? Having a blog war is where it is at. […] Today, we write less because we have a cogent point to make or an entertaining narrative to share and more because we want to really get some commenters fired up! Page views, favorites, retweets, likes, comments, shares, and reblogs define our culture. If you haven’t been RT’d, are you even relevant? No. The goal in blogging, or at least a new mark of successful blogging or being a successful blogger, isn’t to be “good.” The goal is to have whatever you wrote be so hated or so outrageous or so controversial (when, in fact, it’s not controversial at all) that it—or better yet, you!—becomes a comical meme of sorts. It’s not about whatever idea or story or contribution to culture you made, it’s about whether or not people on the internet can really really hate it or really really make fun of it.
And, a few things that I got horribly wrong, or that I wish I had never typed:
Behind the mask and behind his piercing blue eyes, there’s a sincere, thoughtful person who, yes, loves and needs to have sex, but more importantly, loves and needs to connect with fans through his films.