Below, meet Next Door Studios’ “Mike Matters.” Once I got over the fact that Mike Matters is the worst porn star name since Dylan McLovin, and once I got over that Superman tattoo (yikes), I realized that if Cody Cummings and Rod Daily had sex and had a baby, that baby would grow up to look like Mike Matters! I also realized that a male pregnancy is significantly more likely than Cody Cummings ever having sex with another man. And THEN, I realized that I would like to masturbate to Mike Matters because he’s hot.
Mike Matters, everybody! He matters.
Next Door Male: Mike Matters