Rush and Viagra
the ‘nitrate’ part of amyl nitrate (also known as poppers) can cause dangerous
drops in blood pressure when mixed with those pills that direct your blood flow
to, um, your southern extremities. Of course, we shouldn’t fail to mention that
rigor mortis also gets you hard quick.
Appletini and Valium
alcohol alongside any number of sedatives-like Valium, Ativan, Dalmane,
Nembutal and Seconal-can cause depressed cardiac response and can greatly
increase the chance of Sudden Adult Death syndrome. Chances improve dramatically if you’re old
and your ticker’s not as nubile as that of, say, Marilyn Monroe. Oops! Too
Booze and Blow
counteract the effects of drinking late at night and make you think that you’re
not a deathly bore, but it also does a fatal punch on your liver. (Tylenol isn’t much better, but it takes a
little longer and is not as glamorous.) Though your embattled liver does its best to metabolize each substance if ingested on its own,
studies have shown that the blood-cleansing organ works overtime to create a third metabolizer
to handle the combo meal of liquor and blow together. Of course, for you hardcore drunks, there’s
probably cirrhosis in your future no matter what. Drink up, sad clown!
E and HIV
studies have shown that AIDS drugs can potentially greatly increase the
toxicity of that MDMA you just took, leading to spontaneous death. Now that’s a
Grey Goose and G
popular way to die these days, whether in the Pines or
You’d think we were goths, the way we faggots down this stuff! (Maybe because
it’s so good for date rapes?) G is made from floor stripper, people, not simple
syrup or tonic. So add a Cosmo to this
colorless, odorless, tactless solution and your entire pulmonary apparatus goes
to sleep as well. Good night, sweet princess.
We hardly knew thee.
kidding! We love this new look. Ugly is the new pretty. YAY!
A source has leaked details to The Sword about a new fucky fucky extension that will not be beholden to any of Apple's pearl-clutching restrictions.
I don't take sex seriously enough to commit to a Master/slave dynamic, so instead I'll just read this new blog written by a 39-year-old British sub slut named Fang.
1. You know it's a leather orgy when everyone takes a moment between foreplay and fucking so they can put their clothes back on.
When I discovered that a friend of mine trims his chest hair, I told him to think of the children in Africa who have no chest hair to shave in the first place. Now I've found a fur-obsessed Photoshopper who is helming the good fight against body shavers everywhere.
The hypothesis: you can put a shitload of condoms on a dildo. The conclusion: you can put a shitload of condoms on a dildo.