Here Are The Finalists In The “Win Cody Cummings’ Underwear” Contest

Out of 20 entries (and almost a dozen more that weren’t published because they included threats of extreme violence toward me and Cody Cummings!), here are the three finalists in the contest to win a pair of the gay porn icon’s underwear and a one-year membership to NakedSword.com:

The rules were simple: Write your own Cody Cummings fantasy! The fantasy can include you or someone else, but it MUST include Cody Cummings. It can be as real or as implausible as you want. It can be romantic or it can be nasty. It’s your fantasy! What have you always dreamed about Cody Cummings doing to you? What have you always dreamed about doing to Cody Cummings?

In order of when the fantasies were posted, here are the three finalists.

ChipotleLuvr:

My fantasy is to take Cody’s gf out to lunch at Chipotle on a day when he expects to have Afternoon Delight with her. Judging on the looks of the chicks he tweets about, I’m pretty sure she’ll do the rest for me and put more shit on his cock than the dirtiest bottom ever could.

Afterward, she and I go out for drinks to check out the pics of the affair and tweet the best ones.

Elitist:

Cody Cummings recedes into the shadows of the public eye and is never seen again. The end.

Pal:

In my fantasy Anthony Romero and Austin wilde and I are standing on a side of a giant tank with Cody in. We have amazing, threesome sex for days and days and days, every time we ejaculate we do it into the tank with Cody. Because he is so straight Cody refuses to consume our delicious semen and slowly the tank starts to fill up. The days go by in a hyper-erotic haze of Anthony’s ass and Austin’s meaty cock until Cody’s upturned face is just sticking of the top of the cum filled tank. He is very close to drowning. He begs us to let him be free, we consider it and as we are fucking agree that we might free him. However we need to finish having sex so we ejaculate one last time into the tank, this turns out to be the final straw and the glorious tank of cum closes over Cody’s head drowning him…

BUT THEN!

Zach from The Sword bursts in, screaming “I have to save cody! If he dies how will The Sword produce any reliable content?????!!!!” However as he runs over he has to wrestle with a fundamental conflict in himself. Standing there are Anthony Romero and Austin Wilde, his second and third favorite porn stars respectively after Cody (in the closet number one spot of course). He has to choose between them or Cody and his blog. As if mesmerized he walks towards to the couple, his trousers tenting. And, like deadly sirens the two men motion him over readying themselves to have sex with him. Cody’s arm breaks the surface of the giant bath of semen momentarily before being sucked back below. Zach seems to ignore it getting closer and closer and closer to his two lust interests…

At last the moment he turns away and dives into the tank (his clothes evaporating mid drop out of the will power of pure desire!) The beautiful, life giving liquid closes over his head, we hear nothing for several seconds. Then another few second. Then a minute. We watch, absently jacking each others cocks. Still nothing. After while Anthony suggests that they have probably both drowned and that we should try and fish them out with the brittle, plastic stick which is Cody’s girlfriend.

BUT THEN!!!!!!!!! :O :O :O

Zach breaks the surface, an unconscious Cody in his arms! He begins to earnestly drink the the giant concoction of our warm loads in the tank to keep he and Cody from going under again, all the time muttering to himself, “my content, by beautiful homophobic content.” At last I come to my senses, “we have to save him!” I shout to Anthony and Austin. We run out, looking for Cody’s girlfriend to try and fish them both out with. It takes us several minutes to find her as there are several brooms and some chairs which we mistake for her at first on account of them having more personality. When we return Zach is becoming engorged with the combined loads, the unconscious Cody weighing on his arms. He looks like he is about to go under!

We throw down Cody’s saggy girlfriend. Zach grabs onto her and we hoist them quickly out. As soon as they are on the side of the tank Zach roles Cody over and begins give him desperate mouth to mouth resuscitation. After a several tense moments Cody coughs, splutters and then looks confusedly up at Zach. There is a tense moment as if Cody can’t believe that he is here naked, covered in semen having just been kissed by the editor of The Sword, his biggest hater and lover. Then he lunges forward…!

And passionately kisses Zach. Several seconds later we all join in the fun. A crazy sex driven five way ensues, with the now reborn Cody Cummings. He still refuses to bottom but he agrees to fuck Zach who dribbles eagerly at the prospect of having a gay porn legends dick inside him. After lubing up and lining up Cody pushes his dick deep into Zach who gasps in ecstasy. Several seconds later he pulls out. Looks at us disappointedley and says “Sorry, not as good as pussy, you fucking gays still disgust, even after that very Freudian drowning rebirth sequence,” (This part is total fantasy as I doubt Cody would say anything nearly as intelligent as this).

We promptly beat him and his girlfriend to death with our. We then use their fresh blood as lube for a final all night orgy. We dump their bodies in the cum filled tank and leave this specially built “Cody Conversion,” house, feeling satisfied but ultimately as if we have failed.

Several weeks later the bodies are discovered by the police. They are unable to work who perpetrated the ‘Cummings Case’ as it comes to be known, however it is this very blog comment that eventually leads them to the killers and they catch up with all four of us. Anthony and Austin die in their sleep from poison, taking the suicidal way out together as a SWAT team reaches their doorstep. Zach disappears underground as a fugitive and continues blogging, however he never attains the same readership as before, without a Cummings to post about The Sword quickly shrivels to nothing and Zach is never heard of again.

I myself am caught by the police and declared clinically insane then interned in a mental institute for life with only the thoughts of that amazing, murderess night of sex to comfort me. When The police find me I am clutching Cody’s sweaty Andrew Christian swim trunks to my chest which I had won in a sleazy online competition a few weeks earlier. It was with these that I lured Anthony Romero, Austin Wilde and Cody Cummings together and it was with this story that Zach and ensuing discussions after this post about postage of prize which let him know where to find me on that fateful night. That let him know my terrible intention…

While some details have been embellished this is a story that is about to become terribly true. If I win Cody’s underwear we will see his new life, his rebirth, his death, Anthony and Austin’s tragic suicide, Zach on the run from the cops and I the terrible perpetrator sent insane by my actions. (I promise to film the action)

In years to come the press described the death and sex surrounding Cody’s murder necessary. The sort of person he was, he only deserved it. This is the terrible fantasy, the beautiful and erotic premonition of a future yet to be seen.

I’ll be drawing one of these commenters’ names from a hat on Monday.

 

7 thoughts on “Here Are The Finalists In The “Win Cody Cummings’ Underwear” Contest”

  1. I’m sorry I missed this little contest! Not that I have any need for the underwear, but the year’s subscription would be nice.
    Oh well, maybe next time…:-)

  2. You just know Jeanne Marie is angrily fingering herself over this and the fact that she couldn’t participate.

    1. LOL I doubt anyone would bother for some nasty used undies, but a years membership to NakedSword is pretty decent.

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