What are the 2011 TLA Gay Awards? Who cares! I’m a nominee!
Ordinarily I’d make fun of an award that honored something called a “Twitter-Maniac: Most Prolific In The Biz,” but since I’ve been nominated for one, this is the most important award ever bestowed on anyone in the history of awards. What better way to have your life validated than to be recognized for the incoherent 140-character bullshit you type, while drunk, on a website whose logo consists of a whale suspended midair by birds with strings in their mouths? Vote for me here.
Look at all the dumb, boring competitors. I can’t lose!