Mick Lovell told me to meet him in an online chat room at 11 a.m. PST this morning, but there has apparently been some sort of delay. It has been almost seven hours but the screen says “WE ARE WAITING FOR THE MODEL,” so I am waiting.
I have been waiting for over six hours and fifty minutes because Mick Lovell told me to be here at 11:00 a.m. PST (8 p.m. CET, in Prague) so we could talk, but he isn’t here like he said he’d be. I am waiting for Mick Lovell. I am waiting for the model.
Mick?
Mick.
Mick?
Mick?
MICK!!!!
You’re here!
Mick, now that we’re alone, we need to talk.
Hello? It’s me. I’m right here. No, over here! Ha ha. You look so cute today. Where were you all day? I’ve been waiting and was here promptly just like you told me to be. Were you at the gym? Were you at school? Oh wait, it’s summer, so you’re not in school right now. So, where were you then?
Oh, who cares. What’s important is that you’re here now and we are together. Anyway, when will you be visiting San Francisco? I know you said you would love to visit soon, and if you’re going to come, summer is the perfect time. The weather is perfect. Not too hot, not too cold. It’s perfect, just like you, my perfect perfect pretty Mick.
Mick? Hello? It’s me!
Mick?
Hello?
Whoa whoa whoa…it looks like you need a belt, big boy! Ha ha *wink*.
Mick, did you make your jorts yourself, or did you buy them from Urban Outfitters or American Apparel? Do they have those sorts of stores in Salt Lake City where you are from? Speaking of Salt Lake City, there sure are a lot of Mormons there. Are you a Mormon, Mick? What do you think of Mitt Romney? You have such similar names!
Mitt, Mick, Mitt, Mick, Mitt, Mick.
Mick?
I don’t understand what’s going on.
What in the world?!
I’m here to talk, as you requested. Are you even listening to me? I want to talk to you about our future, but I feel as if you don’t even know that I’m here? I did just as you asked and I’m here, even though I’m supposed to be working, so please don’t ignore me now. I’m risking my job to talk to you right now on company time, Mick. Don’t play these games now, not when I need you most. Please stop, Mick! Pull up your jorts and talk to me like a human being. We have a future to discuss.
MICK?!
If you want me to leave, just say the word. Whatever I did to deserve this, I’m sorry. But I can’t make it right unless you TELL ME what’s wrong.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
It doesn’t have to end like this.
I know it hurts right now Zach that Mick doesn’t acknowledge you being there but he’s just conflicted. He’s not sure what he wants or who he wants. Someday he will come around and you’ll still be standing there waiting for him like a lovesick Shiba Inu puppy.
This was hilarious! Loved it! Some of the online questions from other participants though…sheesh who are these people who show up to every porn chat and say the same damned things? “Show us your asshole!” “Finger yourself!”
Kathy Bates would be proud! LOL!
Every time I fear I might be insane all I need to do is scroll down the chat log for a live show like this.
Holy shit, am I ever not insane.
Careful Zach. Did you notice the guy asking Mick (in German) to show him a shot of feet playing with a soccer ball? I think you have rivals.
…. your devotion to Mick will pay off, Zach. I think he was playing hard to get. The games boys play, right ? But some reason, I don’t think you were both alone in that chatroom. I can appreciate your effort to *only* chat about the seriousness and future of your relationship, even though Mick tried to distract you by undressing. BRAVO to you ! And best of luck.
This is my FAVORITE Sword post in recent memory!! If Mick won’t love you Zach, I will.
LOL Zach, your obsession with Mick is amazing! So much dedication! Don’t give up on him yet!
I love these posts.
Poor Zach. I hope Mick eventually understands the depth of your love.