Today, we examine this next shining example in the pantheon of “perpetual bachelors” who slipped under the suburban radar and into the mainstream.
Please just take a look at the image at right: There are six flaming homosexuals coming home at dawn still dressed from Costume Night at a bar (in THE VILLAGE) circa 1977, a night which likely involved poppers, several gallons of beer, and about a dozen dicks and not a few fists up their rectums while in a dark alley, warehouse or shipping container. Also: See that bar sign in the not so distant background? It says The Ramrod. How the fuck did anyone not know these fags were fags?
The Evidence Mom Ignored
Occupation: musical performers whose popularity peaked in the disco era with hits like “Macho Man,” “In the Navy,” and “YMCA” (which the actual YMCA organization thought, at the time, was like a commercial for them and never sued for trademark infringement). Lesser known tracks from their first album include “Fire Island,” and “San Francisco (You’ve Got Me).” 11 out of 10 gay points (they did everything but record a song called “Fucking in a Bathhouse” with live moans and the sound of balls slapping asses).
Appearance: See above. The inspiration for their dress came from many of the denim-, flannel- and leather-clad denizens of the Village in the 70s, but all stemmed from the group’s producer, Jacques Morali, seeing Felipe Rose, the “Native American,” dressed up like that with bells around his ankles while bartending in the Village. 10/10
Demeanor: always campy, enacting “macho” stereotypes for a 70s mass audience who was apparently too busy discovering themselves, cocaine and their own vaginas to think that any of this was ironic. 9/10
Beards: They were pretty much all proud cocksmokers from the get as far as we know, but their current website is, curiously, scrubbed of any reference to their gayness or their status as gay icons. 10/10
Minstrelsy: Does their 1980 b-movie flop “Can’t Stop the Music” count? Also, David Hodo, the construction worker, was once on “What’s My Line?” because he liked to roller skate while eating fire… until he burnt his face. 10/10
Total: 50 points – My Eyes! My Eyes! (see scale)
We actually have no idea how this happened. Basically, the Village People were like some once-in-a-millennium phenomenon, like a comet, that whizzed by so fast that they seared the common smarts out of audiences’ brains with their big gay flames.
Now sit back and enjoy the soft-porny video for Macho Man, featuring some hot 70s dudes working out at the gym.
Here’s an early 80s novelty video for “5 o’clock in the Morning” which features Victor Willis (the cop) playing it straight with the gender-neutral lyrics (“the one I love”) with a pretend girlfriend in the room.
Mom Thought He Was Straight? Part 1: Charles Nelson Reilly
Mom Thought He Was Straight? Part 2: Anthony Perkins
Mom Thought He Was Straight? Part 3: Elton John
Mom Thought He Was Straight? Part 4: Truman Capote
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