No, The Gay Porn Industry Did Not Kill Arpad Miklos

The gay porn industry did not kill Erik Rhodes. The gay porn industry did not kill Josh Weston. The gay porn industry did not kill Roman Ragazzi. The gay porn industry did not kill Corbin Fisher’s Sean or director John Bruno. The gay porn industry did not kill Arpad Miklos on Sunday night.

Also: The gay porn industry did not send Ryan Idol to prison. The gay porn industry did not send Sebastian Young to prison. The gay porn industry did not send Tag Adams to prison. The gay porn industry did not send Robert Van Damme or Harlow Cuadra to prison either.

Good people make bad choices. Bad things happen to good people. Sometimes bad people do bad things. Drugs, crime, fame, mental illness, and bad luck could all be to blame. Sometimes the only person to blame is the person himself. Or, why does there have to be “someone” to blame at all?

I’m reading comments from people—some well-intentioned and some completely insane—who say that the gay porn industry didn’t do a good enough job of taking care of Arpad Miklos. Depression, which we’re told is what led to Arpad Miklos’ suicide, is a chemical imbalance in the brain that has nothing to do with working in gay porn. Maybe Arpad Miklos went to work in gay porn because he thought it would make him happy. Maybe it worked, for a while at least.

The gay porn industry is rough. Life is rougher. Two of my extended family members committed suicide in 2003 and 2009. Both of them were unemployed. Who’s to blame?

Would Arpad Miklos still be alive today if he worked in a cupcake shop?

 

 

78 thoughts on “No, The Gay Porn Industry Did Not Kill Arpad Miklos”

  1. Very good article. I recently came across your web site and wanted to mention that I have truly liked checking the blog site articles. No matter the reason We are signing up your own feed using this program link homepage. wishing you’re writing once more as soon as possible!

  2. (addendum) In Arpad Miklos’ case, anyone with common sense could see suspicous things going on. Steroids were starting to destroy his looks, when they once enhanced them. He wanted to be loved, not just fucked. He was a gentle giant with a caring soul, but could not find the same

  3. The incendiary arrogant tone this article is written in is beyond disgusting. Zach is talking out of his ass or only has his own interests in mind because gee, he makes his money off of porn actors pain.

    I’ve been in front of the camera. It is no picnic. It is work. The measly fee you get paid can be for 2 hours a day or 16 hours! The industry pays most of their actors diddly squat and doesn’t give a hoot about them. They’re like cattle to be used. There is very little glamorous about porn. Drugs are rampant, some allow use of it on the set. Some don’t test for h.i.v. No residuals are offered. Escorting is dangerous and further eats as the performer’s soul, but the high cash that can be earned from it makes it necessary

  4. Really how many men on here making comments are even gay,it makes more sense that these are straight witches laying blaming on everything that has to do with gays,were redirected from another site…….its happened before…..the poisonous/righteous straights or self loathing closet gays

  5. It is so easy to blame a porn star for his demise caused by all sorts of theories … but when that person is no longer alive or has never known them, it is not always a complete picture of their lives, but this is a rather simplistic and sometimes not based on fact but assumption of what caused the death of a porn star.
    I accept that being judgemental is sometime how some want to attribute death of a porn star … but reading some of the comments, I wonder how close one is to the truth of the matter. Possible some come with “emotional baggage” but is this always the case?
    Although I have never professed to know what caused the death of Arpad, but if suicide was to blame, with emotional turmoil of the state of a porn star’s mental ability to think logically, so one can’t say they were to blame for their own death when there may be many external factors have to be taken into consideration … including whether the “management” of the porn industry did a good or bad job of providing emotional support for a worker if they possible knew they had a troubled mind.
    The simple answer is I don’t know the answer to why anyone commits suicide. The more complexed answer is that so many more factors play their part before anyone can give a definitive answer as to what did or did not contribute to death by suicide.

  6. No it was’t the gay porn industry that kill arpad miklos it was that str8 guys for gay eyes movie that he did kill him!!

  7. Saying the porn industry killed Arpad Miklos is a very simplistic answer BUT it is the worst industry to be in if it’s all you have or can do because as much as we are led to believe by porn studios that there is talent involved, there is none. I did two movies and it was truly enough for me. Men have short attention spans and new faces and bodies will always take attention away from the older stars and when all you do is stick your cock in a hole as Arpad did then where is the attraction. I met him on my movie and he was arrogant, insular, insecure and argumentative with me over the time it took to fly from Vegas to SF. it was the last impression I had of him. He was only friendly to one co star that he wanted to sleep with and that was the only person that interested him. He was either very stupid or insanely rude. I am being as honest as I can. When I confronted him on ManHunt about his arrogance to me on the set he called me a derogatory feminine term and blocked me. Rest in peace Arpad.

  8. All I can say is that hopefully he is in peace. I think no one is to be blame, and we are nobody to judge Arpad or anyone who works in this industry, instead of that we can do more showing them our support.

  9. Just some thoughts on this very sad

    One way to ensure the porn industry can’t be blamed for future deaths would be to make it mandatory for performers to go through some sort of psychological screening before they can work and offer counseling at all times. It doesn’t have to be expensive and it would show the industry actually cares about their performers.

    I presume porn isn’t easy and it does take guts to perform sex while being surrounded by a crew and being directed. Why not make a code of conduct so it is clear as an industry you take all concerned serious. And offer a way for new performers to make a clear choice and a safe working environment.

    This will not prevent personal demons to occur but at least you have made the effort as a professional industry

  10. There is no blame attached to the gay porn industry for the death of Arpad Miklos.
    People make there own choices. The shock is that he seemed so Alpha, so in control, so happy with his own choices. Just look at the scenes he did for Jake Cruise in the last years, he was happy to fuck anything. It was a gay betrayal but if he had fucked a goat on screen we would have forgiven him.
    This is heartbreaking he was so major in the industry, and so fucking gorgeous, I am going to cry all week.

    1. People crucified him and his supporters when he did that Jake Cruise scene. How is it that a female porn star can eat another girl out on camera, then assert her heterosexuality when the cameras stop rolling with no consequences. But when a gay porn actor does the same thing, he’s turning his back on the gay community. It’s bullshit. He didn’t deserve that.

  11. Did a curiously disproportionate number of people who work in cupcake shops kill themselves in the last year? Given the number of people who work in gay porn, is the number of suicides that have occurred, statistically speaking, normal?

  12. Whether there is a correlation between porn and suicide is a question that I don’t feel like debating right now. I will say, though, that there is an unfortunate tendency within American society in general to view suicide as a private problem rather than a public one. Yes, the person who chooses to end their own life ultimately makes that decision themselves, but to say that their surroundings played no role in that decision seems naive to me. A number of factors push people in that direction.

    1. Heaven is a bit hotter now. RIP, Arpad.

      I will be curious if people close to him talk a bit more about his depression, etc. (Although thus far every one has described him as pretty private and quiet about himself.

      One of the first things I did think about was his age (more than his profession) and our community’s beauty standards. Right now it reminds me of that guy who had the self help book coming out about aging gracefully in the gay community ……..until he killed himself primarily over aging.

  13. I think it’s too simplified to say that the porn industry killed Arpad Miklos, at the same time though there are some things about it that probably didn’t help. His work really dried up in the last few years. I don’t know if it was because he wouldn’t perform for the scene rates they were offering, or the backlash of his straight scene, or that he wasn’t getting the offers anymore. He never really had a social media presence and his website was pretty much DOA shortly after it launched. I had heard that he did regret doing the straight scene not too long afterwards and that he admitted that it did hurt his career but who really knows? Being admired for you appearance for so long then not finding someone long term who looks past that can be very disheartening. At the same time, there is a realization that this is big part of who you are and that it the attention you get is slowly winding down sooner then you think. Realizing that and then compound with the fact that he didn’t have someone with him who didn’t care about the porn or how he looked could have been a tough pill to swallow.

    He was very active on gay hookup sites. On his Big Muscle profile a few years ago, he was very sad that a recent relationship broke up because his partner couldn’t handle him performing as an escort or in porn. His last relationship ended a few years ago. His friend stated that he didn’t open up that much on being depressed or sad but he could tell that he wasn’t happy. Erik Rhodes didn’t have anything flattering things to say about him when he directed him.

    It’s just a theory of course, but I can’t imagine he was too happy working as a prostitute and performer for so many years and closing in on 50. A lot of guys his age have settled down with long term partners, are getting married, starting families, and building a life together. He may have wanted that, but couldn’t get it for whatever reason. It can’t be easy for someone like him to find someone who either isn’t embarrassed about your past and present work, and someone who only wants you as a notch on their bedpost because of it. Maybe the attention he got from his career was something he couldn’t live without but also loathed at the same time. Maybe at 45 he saw that there weren’t many options for him professionally post porn and even worse for him not a lot in the way of settling down with someone.

    1. Great points, Estelle. I would also add that 45 (or thereabouts) is a bad time for any man going thru a mid-life crisis. If you’re already depressed or tend toward depression, it can be an overwhelming experience. So many things come to a head; fading looks and energy, not to mention, your metabolism. Then you begin to see all too clearly what you’ve done with your life and where it’s heading for the future. If you’ve made poor choices, missed opportunities, lost loved ones thru death or failed relationships, it can be hard to take. Those who are fortunate, have family and friends to see them thru this. Not everyone does, and it’s even harder to find someone that really gets you. So, while I can’t blame his death on the porn industry, I can only imagine it only magnified everything that was wrong with his life.

  14. Our personalities are built by the things that we lived. Our personal story molds us internally so I don’t believe that a prostitute, a male-whore with all dehumanization that prostitution leads has the same psychism the others have. I believe in a certain amount of sequels acting in them since when they dicided to go through this indignity till when prostituing themselves. Prostitutes, like ” money-hungers ” are known for don’t have moral limits when persuing money. Their personal lives mingle with what they do for a living because of the propper nature of it. All is about money and nothing about any other value. They say: “- I begin in this life because I was poor…” or ” -I’m in prostitution because I earn in one hour more than I would earn in a week/month in a 9 to 5 job.” Thinking about it I must say that prostitutes have to have some sort of mental troubles. He was a ‘ porn star ‘, a male-whore , a prostitute so…

  15. How dare you compare that nasty straight pig to those beautiful gay men, whose death was a real loss and tragedy! Better write of young gay kids killing themselves on playgrounds because of ex-gay advocates like Arpad!

  16. Aside from this back and forth banter of who is to blame, the attention should be on the fact that another person has died, another gay man has died.

    We as a community should be more sympathetic to that fact; rather than accusing and blaming we should be voicing better support of our own kind.
    Arpad seemed like a super sweet man and I’m heartbroken that he didn’t have something or someone in his life that could have made him stay around.

    What saddens me the most is people shaming and demonizing him for making the choice he did, it’s not right and what as much shit as we go through as a community, we should all know better.

    At the end of the day we’re all human and need the support of one another to stay standing.

    1. I agree with you, blaming does not help at all. All the Gay Pride walks mean nothing if we don’t support each other as a community.

  17. Since you are putting his name out there, out of respect for the deceased, you could at least spell John Bruno’s name correctly. It’s Bruno, not Burno. It’s this type of lack of regard that’s rampant in “The industry” which has experienced a huge number of suicides in the last 12 months. I have seen the struggles of friends who try to get past their porn careers and into other things. When people find out what they did workwise, they find walls. Lots of them.
    I read an interview recently where some inane blogger asked Francois Sagat what advice he would give to a guy who wants to get into gay porn and he said, “Don’t do it.”
    Now I know why. You have to have a very strong character to deal and let’s face it, in this business, many have personality and so few have character…

      1. All due respect to the departed, but Zach, your response (and your ‘lack of regard’) made me laugh out loud! “Cause of Death: Typo, complicated by apostrophe abuse”…Hehehehe. But seriously, what a way to trivialize a suicide! This guy is actually implying someone is so fragile that misspelling their name will push them into the abyss?

    1. ….Francois Sagat as to what advice he would give to a guy who wants to get into gay porn and he said, “Don’t do it.”
      …… in this business, many have personality and so few have character…

      This is by far the most coherent comment vis-a-vis advice that I’ve read since the news broke. Amidst of all the mendacious, houlier-than-thou, narcissistic, self-loathing diatribes – that it takes a sex-worker (Francois Sagat) to tell it as unassailable as it is.

  18. I absolutely agree. I’m not exactly sure I understand all of this finger pointing. Porn is a job. And last time I checked, it’s not your job’s responsibility to take care of your well being. I don’t recall my places of employment ever giving a damn about my issues and what I was going through. (Some of those jobs were even the source of my problems.) So why should there be different expectations and standards when it comes to porn and their employees? I honestly don’t get that logic. Unfortunately, life can be cruel sometimes. And I’m not being flip about this. I really liked Arpad. I hate that he was in such a dark place that he felt this was his only option. But playing the blame game and looking for a scapegoat doesn’t help matters. How about putting that energy toward something more positive like celebrating his life and remembering the entertainment he brought to a lot of us.

  19. Where is the GTAG now?

    “The Gay Talent Agencies Group (GTAG) is an industry association proactively representing the interests of its members and is designed to serve the needs of the gay adult model and talent agency industry by striving to achieve acceptable best practices in the industry. Through ongoing networking, educational, and professional development programs, GTAG is committed to improving ethics under which members operate their companies and increase awareness about issues that impact the models they represent, the studios to which they provide models and to the adult industry in general. GTAG is an all volunteer group and is administered by a Board of Directors comprised of senior executives from gay adult model and talent agencies that have a combined total of over 50 years of industry experience and are still active in their respective companies.”

  20. OK, I just glanced some of the comments, so I sorry if I repeat any sentiments that have already been expressed. Zach…you’re right. The gay porn industry is not to blame, nor or those who leave negative comments on blogs. Such is the unfortunate cost of celebrity; no matter where it originates. The Onion had a fake, but funny as hell, story about fans being ecstatic that there was a possibility that Gwyneth Paltrow might be punched in the face in the first Iron Man movie; and she didn’t bat an eye. There is a certain level of ire that comes with fame; no matter what its source. I think the comment that I perused that I am most in agreement with is the one left by Ltlantnee. Blunt, but true.

    This is an industry that built upon superficiality and one of the most base needs and desires of human nature. To expect it to be warm and fuzzy is, frankly, ridiculous. As a gay porn star, you will have to deal with a fair amount of overly obsessed fans and incredibly insecure “haters.” Arpad was no child. He knew this. Whether or not he adequately prepared himself is debatable. But people make their own decisions. I can tell you the story of a man who grew up in the worst area of greater Los Angeles who went on to become a wealthy and successful man who gives back to his community as much as possible and the story of a man who grew up in the worst area of greater Los Angeles who went on to get multiple felony convictions and be nothing but a burden to society…and both are true. There are some who get involved in gay porn with very healthy minds and those who get into gay porn because they have very unhealthy minds. It is what it is.

  21. Porn and prostitution are here for the money not to promote any value. There’s no proper place for them in a society which moral values reject what they do and there’s no way to live involved with porn and prostitution and be accepted for the majority of people. It’s like a stain in peoples’ past and a burden to be hided and carried on outside porn. There’s no future in porn or prostitution as a way to get well being or hapiness as porn and prostitution are indefensible in the eyes of our society. Some of us admire the guys we see in porn because their good looks and at the same time despise them for what they represent ( even if their personal lives are ” different ” from what we see ) becouse the fact that they choose to be in porn speaks about low moral levels and lack of dignity. It’s a dual image: Like a fruit that is beautiful outside but rotten inside. Pity, we can’t have all we want in life.

  22. I completely agree with everything that you said. I get tired of hearing of how the gay porn industry is to blame when someone in the industry kills themselves. Depression is to blame not porn.

  23. If you gave a flying shit about these performers, you would monitor the hideous comments that you allow in your scumrag of a blog. Also, you would stop personally attacking and trying to destroy those who don’t please your pompous ass. You embody everything that is wrong with the gay porn industry, and possibly with gay society itself. This final kick to a dead man’s memory should reserve a nice seat in Hell for your flabby ass.

  24. While the porn industry never killed anyone and isn’t the cause of substance abuse, being in a business where you are judged only by your looks (and naked looks at thay), treated like an object instead of a person and scorned by hypocrites and the self righteous, requires a pretty strong individual to survive and thrive. Conventional film stars have a pretty tough time staying sane, happy and substance free–and they don’t have to face all the extra baggage of being a porn star. RIP Sir. For those of us who watch these guys on our screens, they’re people, treat them like that.

  25. Whether it’s suicide or death in general, I do think there is a strong correlation between porn/adult entertainment and early death. Too much to be so flippant and ignore with a ‘such is life’ statement.

    There is a culture created early (usually 18-22) that stays with a person in this industry for the rest of their life. The degradation perhaps…the guilt…the scarlet letter….the drugs & booze…I honestly don’t know. Maybe they’re too unskilled to make money as they grow older. Maybe they are too use to their looks and sexual performance being the only value they bring to this world. Beats me!

    But there is a connection. Just like with football players and crime. They are constantly getting arrested at a far greater rate than the general population. At some point, you realize that it’s not an coincidence…the culture of football…the entitlement mindset of a player…creates a criminal mentality just as porn seems to somehow create a wreckless and depressed mentality. At least, the numbers are too great to dismiss.

  26. Kristofer Weston

    I think maybe the larger issue here may actually be depression and gay men in general – not porn. I’ve had close friends that weren’t in this industry who did the exact same thing with no warning or reason, but nobody ever heard about them passing in the press. You only read about the porn stars who die because they have a bit of notoriety and it’s a little bit of a shock when everyone knows a famous name. People are all different with many backgrounds and ways of coping with life. Guys do porn for a variety of reasons – some healthy and some not so healthy.

    I think it’s best just to remember those who have passed as the amazing human beings they were and let them rest in peace.

  27. Well put, Zach.

    People tend to blame the industry, be it adult or mainstream. Perfomers tend to be on the lower end of the food chain, and while well liked by production, and co-workers (one hopes), it is what it is. You are employed for a set period, to act, and look a certain way.

    I never met Arpad, but he had a good reputation- he would never had worked so frequently were he to have been a problem. Show business in general is rough, as you are frequently judged by your looks and the roles you play – sometimes compared to work one may have done years ago. That can be an issue.

    That being said, life is not fair. Ton’s of people are unemployed, or under-employed, or have struggles. It can be depressing, sometimes in a horrible way. In upsetting times, we crave a quick answer, a pat solution.

    The industry did not kill this guy. When so many cling to life, or to just get through a day, suicide seems so angry. And avoidable.

    I am sure I will be slammed for this, but it is simply my take.

  28. Not the prettiest way to say it, but Zach has a point. KB no one is forcing these pornstars to slave themselves for pennies. It’s very obvious that the pay in porn is not what it once was which is why so many have left the industry or found a way to re-invent their careers in the porn industry. Did the gay porn industry have some influence on Arpad’s suicide? Maybe. But as mentioned before these are grown men who ultimately have to make the decisions for themselves on their lives.

    The gay porn industry is what you make it out to be for yourself. There are many of them who have done porn as an additional source of income from an already well-paying job, such as Junior Stellano. And others, like Arpad Miklos, made it a career. Adam Killian has also made it a career, but he also works as a videographer and director in the industry. He also has done some backup dancing as well. Still, it’s sad to hear that a man who as far as I can recall had no drama in the industry chose to end his life for reasons we can only speculate about for the moment. May the man rest in peace.

  29. These models get paid shit = go work in a cupcake shop
    That’s why they ALL have to escort = go work in a cupcake shop
    Put their own Heath at risk = go work in a cupcake shop
    Provided no insurance = many people with post graduate degrees can’t get jobs with insurance.

    People, human beings suffer with depression. Some work in porn and some work in cupcake shops. Neither cupcakes nor working in nor watching porn “causes” suicide. And to suggest it does is just sad.

    Thanks, Zach: education happens everywhere.

    1. Your advice is great! You know, if you live in a world where everything is black and white. Life isn’t that simple buddy. When these guys start gay porn, they usually come from “hardened” backgrounds. Some like Arpad, come from poor countries where they are sold on the idea of coming to America and living the dream! Some come from bad homes. They were abused as children, some physically, some sexually, some mentally, many all of the above. They are introduced to the gay world and are placed on pedestals. The heads of studios promise them the world on a platter and they’re usually naive enough to buy it. They have sugar daddies looking for an IT boy and who provide them with all the material needs they may have. Young hot guys also want them and throw themselves at them. It’s like a drug, and they want more and more. Once their 15 minutes start to go away, all of that starts to go. Then reality begins to set in and it fucking sucks. Guys are intimidated by them and don’t take them completely seriously. Those sugar daddies have moved on. Most can’t get jobs after doing porn. Being in porn automatically disqualifies you from pretty much every job. Add the fact society is still fairly homophobic then the issues is even worse. Unfair, but that’s how it is. Yes, a lucky few make it through and get other jobs. The really put together ones seem to go behind the scenes where they make more money than being in front.A few seem to become DJ’s but that’s also a tough industry in different ways. Many of these guys are ultimately responsible for their actions, but to act like other major factors such as their career in porn is ignored. The gay porn industry is a sick one. Part of it is because we live in a hypocritical society that loves porn but judges its stars and punishes them. Part of it is because those in charge are getting rich of it while screwing others over. Funny, how gay democrats seem to believe in regulation but not when it comes to porn. It also shouldn’t be a question of these companies providing their workers with adequate healthcare. Having sex on camera requires one to be in amazing shape. Many of these performers do that in unhealthy ways and the industry looks the other way and plays dumb. Doing gay porn is like those trick-Chinese-finger-things. Once you realize you’re in trouble and try to pull away, you get sucked back in. Many of these guys begin when they’re young, desperate, and crazy. People in that age group make stupid mistakes all the time and the industry takes advantage of that. I made some horrid decisions when I was that young and I’m grateful that I didn’t pay with any long term consequences, but at the same time, I lucked out by not hanging around with people who were out to exploit me. There weren’t any people in my life that pretended to care for me when I was making them money and then discarded me when I wasn’t. The pay is also horrible and the industry refuses to provide fairer rates because they are expected to make their money escorting. They get paid low rates and their careers are limited. If they make over 10 movies a year, they become “overexposed,” and irregardless of how hot they are heard of less and less from thereon. The industry also rewards homophobia. Any new model with a brain knows to play the “straight” card and play the gay4pay game. They know the self-loathing heads of these companies will require them to do less sexually for higher pay as long as they announce their red hot heterosexuality. This also allows them to extend their “shelf-life.” A real straight men would not do gay porn. Yes, it’s true that straight porn pays less, but in gay porn, a male, is never “overexposed.” A straight porn star can do 100 movies a year and the public is not going to demand they go away like it is with gay porn. In straight porn, it is the women who become “overexposed.” So a man can work all he wants. Of course, there are exceptions to everything I’ve said… Every time one of these guys kill themselves people refuse to acknowledge that the industry bears SOME responsibility in all of this. This shit is going to continue to occur regularly until then…

      1. You need a fucking hobby. Writing a novel on a gay entertainment blog just shows how vapid a life you have. Take your preaching somewhere else oh righteous one!

        1. Thanks for proving yourself a stupid drama queen. You are stupid because you don’t know that novels are usually longer than a few paragraphs put together. You are a drama queen because, who throws a fit over having to read a few paragraphs?

          1. Agreed!!…Porn stars? English is perhaps not their strongest suit…and they blame everyone else but themselves.

      2. Poor countries? Arpad was a trained chemist before he got into porn. I find it hard to believe their salaries are low. He probably got into porn because of its world wide travel opportunities

  30. What KB said….sorry Zack I think that the industry needs to take part of the blame. But as you blog about the industry you aren’t going to say that, are you?

      1. Tony, you should know that you’re full of shit. Did you KNOW Miklos? Probably not. So don’t pretend to know what he was going through.

        1. I don’t know what he was going through. Neither do you. But for whatever reason HE chose to kill himself. To blame others is just wrong

  31. Yes. The gay porn industry deserves some of the blame. These models get paid shit, that’s why they all have to escort. They put their health at risk but are provided with no insurance to take care of themselves physically and/or mentally. They use these performers despite knowing a large majority of them suffer from depression and instead make their self-esteem issues grow. The industry exploits them and the idiots who buy into their marketing. Like, why is 90% of gay porn by gay4pay models? Because the people willing to spend more on porn are usually self-loathing enough to believe it. If I was a gay porn star, Id be gay4pay too! Why? Because then you are required to do less by the fools you scam.

    And yeah, if most of these guys worked in a cupcake shop, they’d still be alive. People who work in cupcake shops aren’t known to be obsessed with having the perfect weight nor are they encouraged to do drugs like steroids in order to make great cupcakes. People who work in cupcake shops aren’t thrown into a world filled with hard-core drugs at every industry event. People who used to work in cupcakes don’t get fired from their job at Subway because pictures of them making cupcakes were sent to their new boss.

    To say that the gay porn industry has no blame shows what a sheep you are. I’ve always enjoyed this site and find your sarcastic sense of humor to be great, but this is probably the most pathetic you’ve come off.

    1. Alas no one told anyone they HAD to do any type of porn. Sadly image issues are a big portion of the gay community as a whole. Typing this on my phone so it will be brief but many factors contribute to events and I don’t think gay porn should be a scapegoat. If you do truly believe this then you should do your part in not supporting it. If you venture that it is because pay isn’t high enough then I suppose you should ensure you are paying for as much as possible and supporting as much as possible. All in all though we are all responsible for our own decisions. There are many other jobs out there outside of escorting as well – one can in fact work a cupcake shop AND do gay porn. I have a full time career job in addition to my porn endeavors. Regardless it is always a tragedy when an individual passes on prematurely. We must all do our best to learn from others mistakes and do the best to protect ourselves / keep in mind that no matter how shitty life might be we can all take steps to improve it rather than taking our own life and missing out on all the good the future can hold. Just my two cents :). Hope all is well!

    2. First of all I only know lawyers and doctors that get paid $200 an hour and up. Bad paying? Being in porn is like being self employed (actually it is). You buy your own health insurance, pay your own taxes and no employer gets into your private life and tucks you in at night. You get payed for work that is done and you go home and take care of your own business. People behind the scenes see the performers on the days of the filming and don’t go home with them so it is pretty tough to assess who is suffering from depression or taking drugs. As for the escorting, that has nothing to do with porn companies. The performer can get any supplemental job they are educated for. Most have other jobs.

      I have rarely (it happens) ever seen anyone treated badly on a set as another person wrote. The models are catered to even if they come in with an attitude or ADD or are just having a crappy day. All models are asked what they will or won’t do and no one is forced into doing anything they don’t want to do. There are no drugs allowed on the set and all are encouraged to show up and be professional.

    3. Getting into porn takes a certain mindset. I think you get out of it what you want; exhibitionist sex in front of people on camera; meeting similar guys with high sex drives.

      I think the real toll is escorting. Some of these guys have no limits when it comes to what degrading things they do in private for big bucks.

      It’s no wonder to me that most of these guys keep quiet about their escorting escapades. From what I have read, escorting without limits is beyond dehumanizing.

      1. just an average joe

        In either case of porn or escorting, Arpad never accepted a dime when it meant bottoming!

        He had some sort of personal code and values, he acted in accordance to it…this was not about money! This was about sex, and the futile search for validation and love! In other words, he found disappointment.

        Stop making this association of porn/depression/suicide.

        We could make the argument that someone who commits suicide can attribute the cause to watching porn! Because it would sound stupid, so the same goes for working in it.

        Arpad came to this country alone and a foreigner. He made his way in it the best way he could. Plus, he worked in porn in Hungary. And left for America with the hopes of finding a better life. Did he find it? I guess not. Prince Charming never rode in on the white horse to save the day. Anyone who thinks he will, will be sadly disappointing. Fairy Tales don’t come true.

        1. There is a movie out there called Vampire of Budapest. I wonder if anyone has seen it, because…

          Every time I watch it, I see a lot of shaved-chest Arpad Miklos taking it up the butt. In fact, in the two scenes where he appears, Arpad never tops.

          Petty, quibbling detail at the moment, but still…

        2. I wasn’t associating porn/depression/suicide. Others are. I do believe escorting is dehumanizing.

          People who go into porn do so for many reasons. Sex, money (or at least the hope of money), attention, fame, and the right to pick the best and hottest fans to fuck.

          Disappointment is the reality. Sex, money, fame, all fade over time and all you’re left with is you.

          Rhodes is someone who fell into a similar trap. He always said he got into the business for the money. Regardless of your career, choosing a job for the money is a guarantee of disappointment.

          I assume many porn actors are superficial. It’s all about looks and fame. In that regard, porn actors likely make bad choices regarding ‘friends’, boyfriends, and associates based on superficial attachments. That’s to be expected. A big hunky guy isn’t going to be attracted to a 98 pound wimp.

          But making superficial choices means you’re cutting yourself off from people who might actually care for you as a person. If you judge people by superficial standards, you get superficial friends and associates. Bad choices leads to disappointments.

          Anyway, I don’t know enough about Arpad to know what was going on in his personal life and his mind. Clearly he was troubled by something. It’s too bad he chose not to tell us.

          I’m sorry when I hear anyone commits suicide. As they say, permanent solution to a passing problem.

          I’m sorry for the people he left behind.

    4. “KB”..you sound a fool..last i checked no one force these folks to choose porn as a career ..the problem with our society is there will always be someone coming to the aid of individuals who need to take responsibility for there life choices…you want to fuck for a living well there are consequences for these choices….RIP

    5. >They put their health at risk but are provided with no insurance to take care of themselves physically and/or mentally.they use these performers despite knowing a large majority of them suffer from depression and instead make their self-esteem issues grow. why is 90% of gay porn by gay4pay models?And yeah, if most of these guys worked in a cupcake shop, they’d still be alive. People who work in cupcake shops aren’t known to be obsessed with having the perfect weight nor are they encouraged to do drugs like steroids in order to make great cupcakes.People who work in cupcake shops aren’t thrown into a world filled with hard-core drugs at every industry event. People who used to work in cupcakes don’t get fired from their job at Subway because pictures of them making cupcakes were sent to their new boss.To say that the gay porn industry has no blame shows what a sheep you are<

      to say or think people in the gay porn industry die more often than "film stars" or "rock stars" or "athletes" or "blue collar workers" shows what an ignorant catholic/Christian/republican you truly are,truly people like you should be seen and never heard

  32. As I always say, the porn world is a small world so when a porn star dies we hear about it more than we do anonymous strangers. Does not mean they actually die more often than the general population.
    I wonder if the difference between the proportion of porn stars who die of suicide, drug abuse or anything related is that much higher than the proportion of urban gays who die too young of the same.
    I bet it is roughly the same, only difference is the former are publicized whereas many young gay men die too young because of the myriad of issues they have.
    Mental issues happen to many people – and theyhave a higher incidence among gay men for a variety of sociological reasons we probably all can guess about. I am not convinced the porn industry is a particular factor for it at all.

    And even if it was, I agree with Zach. As I said on the other thread, how far do we wanna take the brother’s keeper thing? Those are grown men making their own choices.

  33. Thank you for printing that Zach, nice to hear someone say it. Suicide, depression etc all sad, sad things but no the industry or your job does not make you commit this act.

    1. There is no such thing as a “happy” porn star. Every single one I have met, has had emotional baggage. This industry only helps people move along in their downward spiral.

      1. Sure, everybody does have some sort of “emotional baggage”. When it comes to porn stars though
        … they take the cake. They were either molested, raped or beaten as children. Ask any psychologist if porn stars or hookers are “normal” people. I guarantee all of them will say no. So this brings me back to my point, that this industry destroys damaged people even more than they already are.

        1. “They were either molested, raped or beaten as children” !!!?????

          really and you did your own personal survey,from the point of a religious bible beater or maybe a catholic housewife or even a american republican,lots of people men and women were molested,raped or beaten they didn’t become porn stars
          STOP equating porn with molestation or drugs….i’m quite sure that if you seriously checked many many many american republicans have been molested or raped or beaten at sometime in their lives….

    2. Bullshit. You AND Zach are morons! First of all, leave JAMES (ErikRhodes) out of this. The industry AND it’s shitty, envious viewers have a whole lot more to do with it then you ignorant morons think. They do this as a career, but it’s repercussions are detrimental. It forever scars the intelligent ones, who get swept away. The lifestyle is beyond hard for them to handle. The ugliness and jealousy of the viwers always has negative effects on their mind. They always fall to escorting. They always fall for drugs. They abuse substances to maintain their physique, which still, they are scrutinized by scum as if they are not good enough. It’s disgusting. It is the industry’s fault. They do not care about their clients. Which is easy to believe and expected, yet no justification for how pathetic the industry is. There are so many careless choices that are strictly the industries’ fault and result of; Lack of testing/protection, drugs in contract on set, no moral or care for the “stars”.. Sure, it’s “porn”.. But that means create death cases? The porn stars suffer most in gay porn. So USED by disgusting types of men with NO regard for life. I don’t care how much you all and Zach try and justify companies and blame individuals for their demise. People are people, they have emotions, feelings, they are someone’s family, friend, and still a human.. off camera, yet they are treated like pariahs who deserve their pain, or should just KNOW better and get over things.

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