Here are our top 10 picks from the full list, along with how many beers we’d need before we’d fuck each guy, as well as how many beers we imagine that guy would need to fuck us.

10. Albin Soares

How many beers we’d need: 15

How many beers he’d need: 6

The gayfaced Republican is rich, so while he could probably have his pick of any number of gold-digging queens, we’d go ahead and pass, as we don’t give a shit about how much money our tricks make.

9. Hari Sevugan

How many beers we’d need: 12

How many beers he’d need: 15

He’s a Democrat who likes to teach children and drink in moderation. So, moving on.

8. Josh Vorhees

How many beers we’d need: 6

How many beers he’d need: 20

Cute, but he likes to eat at Subway, and we really don’t feel like scrubbing that leakage out of our sheets.

7. Dave Reichart

How many beers we’d need: 5

How many beers he’d need: 30

Hey there, daddy. This Republican congressman silver fox — an ex-cop, ex-football player and “workout fanatic” — makes us feel dirty in a good way.

6. Ty Cobb

How many beers we’d need: 4

How many beers he’d need: 4

The only out homo on the list works for Ted Kennedy and runs in triathlons. We work for porn and run for last call. It wouldn’t work.

5. Jess Peterson

How many beers we’d need: 4

How many beers he’d need: 2

This former cattle-rancher Washington lobbyist enjoys throwing “roping parties” and admiring “God’s creation.” So yeah. He likes to get pissed on.

4. Brandon Garrett

How many beers we’d need: 1

How many beers he’d need: 12

We’re not going to be racist by implying that he must have a “big black cock.” So we’ll just say that we want to suck on his “black cock.”

3. Carl Loof

How many beers we’d need: 0

How many beers he’d need: 40

This suave staffer has a twin brother. Therefore, we have images in our head.

2. Denis Fleming Jr.

How many beers we’d need: 0

How many beers he’d need: Fuck beer — he’d need a rufie

This Democrat Kentucky congressman is a single father who attributes “Dial soap” and “CVS moisturizer.” And like Mom always said, anyone who uses generic facial cleansers will never suck your dick. That won’t stop us from picturing him in chaps, though.

1. Aaron Schock

How many beers we’d need: We would gay marry him

How many beers he’d need: 7

Have you seen this guy’s body pic? He may be a Republican, but we’d still nap inside his armpit forever.

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