Care of The Sword’s tireless editors, we bring you this roundup (by
no means complete, or even-handed) of stuff going on for those of the
homo persuasion this weekend in the two meccas we currently have
bandwidth to cover, San Francisco and New York. Check back soon to see
us cover more gay urban centers near you (sorry, Cheyenne, we may never
get to you).
Our heavily editorialized listings after the jump…
Since we started this series we’ve been trying to wrap our heads around the idea that, back in the day before AIDS and parades there used to be all these gays in the public eye, but the public just wasn’t very, shall we say, cosmopolitan. Like one of our mothers recently said in re: Truman Capote, “He was just a real character, you know. Theatrical,” and in re: Paul Lynde, “He was gay?” And to boot: “You know who else I was just thinking of, and I think I just realized about them maybe last year: The Village People. Went right over my head.”
Our favorite gay, homophobic, synthetic and “not-gay” celebrities have made for quite a multicolored springtime week in gay photography. Much like Lil’ Kim and Robin Antin must weed through a gaggle of bellowing, horny teens in order to form the perfect “Girlicious” pop group on network television, so must we tastefully curate ten perfect images which synopsize a week in new boyfriends, blowjobs and blowhards. Ladies and queens, we give you this retarded Week In Gay Photos.
Paris Hilton’s hard-partying younger brother was released from jail today after landing in the drunk tank on charges of suspicion of driving while intoxicated. His parents refused to post bail in favor of “tough love” despite the fact that they have, in the past, publicly held their daughter Paris’ skeletal, bronze-streaked hand through her own more publicized stints behind bars. Could it be that the Hilton family is turning the cold shoulder to their son because he’s gay? Author and former club kid James St. James posted the following allegation on The WOW Report yesterday, raising our eyebrows and our hopes (’cause if Barron is following in his sister’s drunk footsteps, might we have a gay sex tape in our future?):
“When I was in Vegas over New Year’s I met a guy who SWORE to me that he had just been partying with Paris Hilton and her little brother Barron, and that Barron was a BIG LADY! YES! In fact, the two of them had “fooled around,” and the next morning, my friend woke up wearing Barron’s clothes, whatever that implies. I just thought I would throw that little story out there in light of today’s news of his arrest. Plus, he’s awfully cute, so I HOPE it’s true.”
That makes all of us. After the jump, check out some other recent “are they or aren’t they” headlines that have had us guessing and instant-messaging.
When GayVN-winning director Jett Blakk sent us the porno How To Seduce A Straight Man, we were curious if we could use it to replicate his success. Three black eyes later, we filed suit against the director. Turns out, we were doing it all wrong. As part of his settlement, Jett Blakk agreed to give us actual tips for seducing straight men. While courage, both liquid and otherwise, is in involved in these recipes, we have to say they work better than the penis in the popcorn trick that nearly resulted in a situation that would have required Romaine Patterson to save us.