Samuel O’Toole Weighs In On Mass Bird, Fish Deaths

It’s nice to see a gay porn star using his brain to dissect the news of the day as opposed to a gay porn star using (what’s left of) his brain to pick fights with other gay porn stars. It’s also nice to see Samuel O’Toole’s fat cock shoot a huge load on Zack Alexander’s face, but I’ll get to that in a minute.

First, Samuel O’Toole explains why “thousands of millions” of birds are falling out of the sky!

The first incident I heard about, like most other Americans, was the thousands or millions of birds “falling” from the sky. What I think is that some guy has been capturing these birds and keeping them in his basement, and then on New Years Eve he killed them all by forcing them all to inhale CO2 so that they would suffocate to death, and then he ran around Arkansas butt ass naked throwing birds around from a purple velour bag.

I’m kidding, that’s not actually what I think lol In all honesty the first thing that popped into my head was chemicals. Having a background in Fire Tech and HazMat, I had the opportunity to learn about Weapons of Mass Destruction and all that fun stuff that countries and terrorist organizations use to kill. Right, fun stuff, in case you didn’t catch the sarcasm in the text. So, the birds, first thing that popped into my head was that possibly the government was testing delivery method for a chemical to be used in warfare.

Go on…

We can’t really get away with testing weapons on Canada or Mexico, that’d be a little too obvious, so why not test it on our own people. Can’t honestly say that it would be the first time.

But how come the birds in the air were affected, but not the humans on the ground, Sammy? Well, this has to do with Vapor Densities of chemicals, and reactions to PPMs. Vapor density refers to whether a vapor is heavier than air, or lighter than air. Air is referred to as having a vapor density of “1″, whereas Helium and Hydrogen, two “floating” gases are lighter than air, and would have vapor densities of less than 1.

Whut.

What this means is that if a chemical were lighter than air, it would “float” above all the houses and people. But wouldn’t it be blown away? That depends. I don’t know what the weather is like in Arkansas, but I know that it was freaking cold! Soooo, if there were little to no wind, a vapor cloud of chemicals lighter than air could hover or move very slowly across the atmosphere, giving the poor birdies enough contact time with the chemical to be affected, and die.

But it’d have to be A LOT of chemicals, right? Unfortunately, no. Animals tend to be more susceptible and react faster to chemicals than humans do, which means they require a lesser amount of exposure to be affected. This is where the PPMs come in, parts per million. What that fancy technical term means is that per million parts/molecules, say 36 PPMs will kill you, out of 1,000,000 molecules that you inhale, 36 or more of chemical “X” will kill you, and 23-35 and you have a 90% chance of dying, and 14-22 and you will be extremely sick and require hospitalization, and so on and so forth.

Ugh too scary! Here’s Samuel O’Toole and Nate Kennedy tag-teaming Zack Alexander.

[Samuel O’Toole]