Their article contains vomitous quotations like, “There’s a radical empowerment that comes from declaring your identity in the public sphere.” That’s true, but it’s not nearly as empowering as pissing all over the faces of people who use words like “radical” and “sphere.” Anyway, their advice is more than stupid — it’s literally the opposite of the advice we would give.

For example, they say that you should note your relationship in your profile, but that you should not tag photos of “you and your partner in matching leather harnesses.” Wrong! Then they say that you should add “LGBT-ish entities to your fan list” like Rachel fucking Maddow but that you should avoid “fan-listing gay porn stars.” Wrong again! And finally, they advise against poking your hot co-worker.

So basically,Time Magazine hates leather harnesses, loves MSNBC and doesn’t want you to get laid. In conclusion, the next time we’re in a waiting room, we’re reading the gonorrhea pamphlet instead.

RELATED:

Instinct Magazine Tries to Drive Lovesick Old Man to Suicide
‘The Advocate’ Embarasses Us… Again
GENRE Magazine to SF: You’re Chopped Liver
Gay Chicago Magazine to Cleanse Its Pages of Porn

How to Come Out on Facebook (Time)