‘The Advocate’ Embarasses Us… Again

The Advocate is of course no stranger to the practice of taking a straight actor, implying that they might be gay with a splashy headline on the cover, and then revealing in a profile or interview that he is completely heterosexual. 

In the case of this interview, for the sake of titillating the homos–or making us all sound like deluded, slithering idiots–Voss asks a series of asinine questions in the style of Jon Lovitz-as-Harvey Fierstein on Saturday Night Live: “If you were a gay bee…”

To wit:

What if a man had presented you with your Oscar instead of Halle Berry? Were you so wrapped up in the moment that you might have kissed him too?
That’s a pretty silly question. No, obviously not. Part of the excitement was that it was a beautiful woman presenting me with such a beautiful moment in my life.

Is there any actor for whom you would’ve made an exception?
No.

Let’s try another approach: For your next gay role, who’d you choose for your on-screen love interest?
You want me to name an actor? No, I can’t answer that question, Brandon. See, you ask me how I deal with rumors, and I also have to deal with not adding fuel to them. Something that would be a completely innocuous comment on my part will be completely taken out of context by the next journalist, so I’d appreciate it if you were understanding about that.

Have I put you in a bad mood?
I’m still in a good mood, but I’m also a relatively serious person, so these questions are difficult for me.

So I guess I shouldn’t ask if it’s true what they say about a man with a prominent nose?
Why would you do that to somebody? You and I don’t know each other, right? We’re complete strangers, actually. I’m being respectful to you, so you have to extend the same courtesy.

Oh, Adrien, it’s all in good fun. I’m trying to show your sense of humor here.
I didn’t sign up for that.

Way to give gay journalists a bad name, Voss!  Go back to downing Ketel sodas and interviewing dancehall divas for HX. The homos don’t need another reason to stop reading The Advocate–or throw it across the room like we just did.

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