TitanMen Offers Former Congressman Aaron Schock $1 Million to Do Gay Porn

In a fine and perfect publicity stunt, gay porn company TitanMen has made it known that they’re willing to pay former Congressman Aaron Schock a fat million dollars if he’ll agree to both come out of the closet and do gay porn all at the same time.

It’s a great offer to make, of course, because Schock is guaranteed never to take them up on it — and in case you somehow weren’t aware, $1 million in today’s porn economy is, like, an annual operating budget for some of these companies. Not that I know what Titan’s annual budget is.

But anyway, I’ll play along.

TitanMen Vice-President and managing partner Keith Webb issued a cheeky statement, in part obviously to publicize the thinly veiled parody of Schock’s case that they already made called ‘Cauke for President,’ and what do you know it gets released today! “TitanMen has a history of signing iconically handsome men with both brains and brawn, and Aaron Schock fits that profile to a T.”

He adds, “Despite Schock’s scandal over allegedly misappropriating campaign funds, he has so much more to offer our fans. What we’re offering is a win-win situation, giving him the opportunity to break free and come out in a whole new world!”

Schock is of course still closeted and keeping a low profile these days — he hasn’t even tweeted since he couldn’t help but correct an article that mistakenly suggested his replacement’s new office paint job, covering Schock’s Downton Abbey aesthetic, happened after his election.

Meanwhile, Cauke for President stars newcomer Matthew Bosch, along with Dallas Steele, David Benjamin, Nick Prescott, Tex Davidson, Adam Ramzi, and Luke Adams, with a cameo by gay political bloggers Matt Baume, and Joe Jervis from JoeMyGod.

Here’s the trailer, in case you missed it the first time.

 

[TitanMen: Cauke for President]

 

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