The U.S. Olympic Trials for swimming reached their climax on Sunday, ending an eight-day stretch where I climaxed every night staring at my TV with a massive boner. From veterans and newbies alike, there was never a lack of stunning physical specimens to drool over. (If you only like hairy guys, you will sadly be disappointed).
Which one of these swimmers is the hottest? Vote in our poll below, and check out my Top 10 ranking…
10. Blake Pieroni
Blake didn’t qualify in an individual event, but made the cut for the 100m freestyle relay. I love his nipples. And biceps. And eyes.
9. Nic Fink
Nic won the 200m breaststroke. More like pecstroke, amirite?!
8. Andrew Wilson
Andrew finished second in both the 100m and 200m breast, and will go to Tokyo for both races. He looks just as cute clothed as half-naked.
7. Bobby Finke
Bobby likes to go the distance, winning both the 800 and 1,500m freestyle. So if stamina is your game, super cute Bobby (who also wins for best hair) is your man.
6. Matt Grevers
Matt didn’t qualify for Tokyo, finishing 6th in the 100m backstroke in his competitive swan song. But he already has six Olympic medals, including two golds. But he’s still 6-foot-8 inches (!!!) of stud.
5. Ryan Lochte
The famous himbo didn’t make the team this year in likely his final shot, placing 7th in the 200IM. But he already has 12 Olympic medals, and is looking just as hot in his daddy phase (he actually is a daddy now…)
4. Nathan Adrian
This 6-foot-6 jock has absolutely the cutest smile ever. I melt just seeing it, and the positive energy that he exudes. The five-time Olympic gold medalist just barely missed a spot on the team, finishing third in the 50m free–all the more stunning considering he was fighting testicular cancer in late 2018. (We love his ESPN Bodies Issue pics from 2016…)
3. Caeleb Dressel
The current face of USA Swimming, this jock has a few Olympic golds and won eight medals at the 2019 World Championships. He is a freestyle and butterfly specialist and is expected to win multiple medals in Tokyo. He’s a stud who’s cocky, but not annoying cocky. And yeah, those abs…
2. Ryan Murphy
So sexy, so sweet…this 6-foot-3 man is husband material. Ryan is like Caeleb’s quieter brother. He already has three Olympic gold medals and is the backstroke king. (As in, get on your back so I can stroke you, dammit!). And fuck yes with those shoulders…
1. Michael Andrew
22, 6-foot-5, 205 pounds. Those goddamn eyes. That fucking face. That hot body. I can’t. I am obsessed with this gorgeous man, who epitomizes tall, dark and handsome. He won the 200IM, the 100M breast and got second in the 50m free, and is a multi-medal threat in Tokyo. (Yeah, yeah…I don’t give a shit that he won’t get the vaccine…)
Who do you think is the hottest? Vote in our poll!
I personally liked Andrew Wilson. Can’t believe he got 9th in the poll.
Caeleb Dressel…period.
Won’t get vaccinated. Loser!
Now if they just completed in speedos!
This is a Sophie’s Choice-like situation; I hate it. Love them all. Gun to head: Ryan Murphy.
That’s an awesome line-up of super hot guys. I went with Caeleb Dressel.
Meh. Attrative in a ‘Stepford Wives’ kind of way: Bland an somewhat forgettable.
That was way too difficult to pick just one. I’d have to see them all in action hehe.
Gotta go with Murphy. Hot stuff!
Ryan Lochte love him, his body, his big feet, his cocky attitude. He can gangbang me all by himself. Matt Grevers has a great body and height but that potato looking head is a big zero for me.
I had an EXTREMELY difficult time choosing. It was like a 4 way tie. However, the preferences of most voters are not at all similar to mine.