Late last week New York City’s Department of Health published a memo with sex tips for surviving the coronavirus pandemic. It basically said you should stop fucking strangers you meet online and just stick to beating your own meat.
The now-deleted memo suggested New Yorkers to “stay home and minimize contact with others to reduce the spread of COVID-19.” That means you can’t even leave the house for a dick appointment. The memo says that if you’re used to meeting people online for sex you should hit pause while this pandemic is going on. Instead of trolling Grindr and Scruff for a stranger’s hard cock, they suggest that “video dates, sexting, or chat rooms may be options for you.” So while it’s technically okay to go on Grindr and sext with those random, headless torsos, you shouldn’t meet up with them and actually have sex.
https://twitter.com/chrissyford/status/1241341554742214656?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.edgemedianetwork.com%2Fnews%2Fnational%2F%2F289756
The memo also suggests that you are your own safest sex partner. COVID-19 can’t be spread through masturbation, so it’s perfectly fine to continue stroking your own cock while you’re in quarantine! Just be sure to wash your hands and all your sex toys after you’re done.
Most men, even those not in New York, seem to be taking the memo’s advice. Ever since the world was told to self-quarantine, Twitter has been a breeding ground for “I’m jacking off all day” content. Major porn studios have even taken notice and have started giving away free memberships.
Social Distancing, Day 2.
Me to my d*ck for the 3rd time today: pic.twitter.com/NueUrwZd52
— non-festive ANT (@ANTFERNY) March 15, 2020
My dick every 45 minutes during quarantine. pic.twitter.com/PA8PQYVXbs
— Kris Marc-Joseph (@krismarcjoseph) March 20, 2020
Advocate reported earlier this month that masturbation actually increases your white blood cell count and those are a “key component of the immune system’s defenses against disease and foreign invaders.” It seems that jacking off could be extremely helpful in making sure that you don’t contract coronavirus. So the NYC Department of Health is actually doing citizens a huge favor by telling them to wank off!
The pro-masturbation memo was unfortunately deleted after it got some media traction. But luckily you can still view screenshots of the memo (pictured above) and learn all about how you can safely jack off during this global pandemic.
Good luck getting gay men to stop fucking. It’s a smarter idea to create mask & glove fetish porn.