Larry’s Last Stand: Foot-Tapping = Free Speech!

“His attorney suggested… that his foot tapping in an airport men’s
room may have been protected by the First Amendment right to freedom of
speech,” CNN.com reports.
The defense reasons that foot-tapping is perfectly legal under the
Amendment, in the instances, for example, that Senator Craig was merely
rehearsing steps for a restroom production of STOMP!, squashing
a cockroach or some type of pesky toilet vermin, stomping out his
frustrations during a constipated period of boredom, or performing some
type of flirtatious apache dance in a private moment of modern
sociological commentary that was merely observatory and performative
with no motive of a courtship outcome (also during a constipated period
of boredom). Despite evidence pointing to the more obvious theory that
Craig was simply seeking out strange dick for the feasting, his lawyer
Billy Martin went on to suggest that because the behavior was witnessed
by only one arresting officer, none were offended by the foot-play
making charges of disorderly conduct invalid. 

If that were true, then why are we still so grossed out? AUGH!!!

RELATED:
Gay Restroom Goblin Officially Brings Discredit on Senate
In Senate, Better to Be Lying, Corrupt Thief Than Be Gay

Foot tapping protected by First Amendment, Craig’s lawyer says (CNN.com)
Minnesota court hears Larry Craig’s appeal (The Idaho Statesman)

0 thoughts on “Larry’s Last Stand: Foot-Tapping = Free Speech!”

  1. Of course it isn’t illegal to pick someone up anywhere. But do you think Larry Craig was looking for someone to take home? He had a plane to catch, didn’t he?

    The gals on SATC would most certainly have been arrested if caught — in fact, that would have made for a funny episode!

  2. According to the officer (and my memory), he reached underneath the partition with his left hand and gave him some kind of sign. Was he also rehearsing for a restroom production of “The Miracle Worker”? Or “Waiting for Lefty”?

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