sun damage citywide. In lieu of memories, we dug our cameras out of our short shorts to help jog the memories of The Sword’s Blunder Down Under.
(photos by John Mundy and Michael Stabile)
The day started early, maybe even the day before, with hand-waving bears, Elton John music and Bacardi Breezers.
Absinthe drinkers were known to hallucinate green fairies, so we don’t think we’re too far off in thinking that GHB produces beglittered twinks hawking chicken skewers.
We aren’t sure what sort of visions that a Bacardi Breezer produces-you’ll have to ask San Francisco Supervisor and SF2Oz goodwill ambassador Bevan Dufty.
Later, as the parade got going, Gloss Magazine’s Bevin Shamel (far left), a beaded-SF Treasurer Jose Cisneros and Bloomberg’s Dan Levy (far right) cozy up to some street trade. While brothels are legal in Sydney, this greasy-haired urchin was considered too unhygienic and was eventually traded in for some tickets to Margret Cho.
The urchin eventually ate a glow stick and enjoyed visions of Bevan Dufty.
This Snow White was not felled by a piece of small apple in her windpipe, as in the original fairy tale, but rather by a large Adam’s apple that could not be dislodged.
She should have gone to Bangkok and had it filed down like the rest of us.
We forgot how glamorous smoking was until we saw this beauty.
Or this one. Crypt keeper Kathy Griffin crossed by the SF2Oz delegation while during her very personal march to the “End Joan Rivers Syndrome Now” float.
Oddly, no one stepped up to pirate these music files.
Canadian Mounties may always get their men, but their Australian counterparts only secure weird geisha robots on ketamine.
Trannyshack‘s Heklina cleanses her palate of an Aussie’s outback, then calls for more.
The Bindi Irwin fan club waits for the MDMA to kick in.
Ahh, there we go. With drugs, even the little Aussie’s raps are danceable.
The tie-dyed flag dancers in hot pants may accurately represent San Francisco gay culture, but their presence at the SF2Oz goodwill float might actually cause Oz to restrict future visits.
Gloss Magazine editor and Strong Island resident Bevin Shamel and San Francisco Supervisor Bevan Dufty capture Lord Mayor Clover Moore with a magical string of beads. Soon after, she noticed the flag dancers and had us deported. Currently, she’s in the process of asking San Mateo to take over San Francisco’s sister city duties.
A source has leaked details to The Sword about a new fucky fucky extension that will not be beholden to any of Apple's pearl-clutching restrictions.
I don't take sex seriously enough to commit to a Master/slave dynamic, so instead I'll just read this new blog written by a 39-year-old British sub slut named Fang.
1. You know it's a leather orgy when everyone takes a moment between foreplay and fucking so they can put their clothes back on.
When I discovered that a friend of mine trims his chest hair, I told him to think of the children in Africa who have no chest hair to shave in the first place. Now I've found a fur-obsessed Photoshopper who is helming the good fight against body shavers everywhere.
The hypothesis: you can put a shitload of condoms on a dildo. The conclusion: you can put a shitload of condoms on a dildo.