Sword Says

Screening of Gus Van Sant’s Paranoid Park


Letterman Digital Arts Center Premiere Theater
San Francisco

December 8, 7PM

After closing out his “death trilogy” with Last Days, the critically polarizing Van Sant heads in a new direction with Paranoid Park. A dreamlike portrait of teen alienation and presented as a Super-8 diary by the central adolescent character, the film won the 60th Anniversary Award at the 2007 Cannes Film Festival. This is your chance to see it before its U.S. release, and the director himself is expected to appear at the screening.  $15.  Tickets available here.


Hot Mess!


The Stud
9th & Harrison
San Francisco

Saturdays 10PM – 4AM

The sloppiest kids in town are colonizing the Stud for this new Saturday party, featuring drink specials for exhibitionists, live whipped-cream wrestling and Frat House DJ Kidd Sysko.

Star Fridays


Star Lounge

Chelsea Hotel Basement

222 W 23rd Street
New York

Fridays 10PM – 4AM

It’s a fun scene and it won an HX Award for Best Small Club Night. So come back to Chelsea for some red velvet-and- chandelier-style glamour, brought to you by Josh Wood (Garden of ONO), Matt Tratner and Nick Van Bremen, with DJ Lina.

Barresi Switch-Hits on Cruise Gay Rumors


Porn director-turned- private investigator Paul Barresi
claims that he’s found no evidence of Tom Cruise’s rumored homosexuality, despite
the connection to Scientology, a gay vague haircut and a seemingly endless
stream of court-challenged claims by former lovers, according to In Touch Weekly. “Everything I’ve
found and everything I know points to Tom being heterosexual,” Paul told
the magazine.
  Oddly, it was only a year ago that Barresi was in the
opposite situation
– facing legal threats from Cruise’s celebrity legal
eagle, Bert Fields, to remove a claim by Barresi that he had found evidence of the star’s sexcapades with a West Hollywood escort.

The Decrying of Lott’s 69


We have no interest at the moment in confirming the validity of Today’s Most Popular Gay Rumor Involving a Possibly Closeted Congressional Republican, and would prefer simply to revel in the delicious, drama-promising, unconfirmed glory of it all. The blog BigHeadDC attempted to break the story yesterday, following Trent Lott’s abrupt resignation announcement and based on some truly slippery email correspondence with obviously attention-loving gay escort-cum-blogger Benjamin Nicholas. The rumor has already been denounced by the HuffPo, spat upon by Wonkette, re-attributed to Gawker and slipperily denied by Nicholas himself, but that doesn’t make it untrue (as Dan Savage has been quick to note).

Separated at Birth? Atlantis Cruises v. RSVP Vacations


When RSVP Vacations, the other gay cruise company, got sold to Atlantis Events this past fall, fans of the gay cruise experience blogged and commented on the demise of RSVP and how this consolidation will affect their sarong party plans on next year’s Caribbean Fantasy. We didn’t have the stomach to go on one ourselves, but we did spend a good chunk of one afternoon poking fun at nauseating YouTube photo montages and gouge-your-eyes-out horrific and suicide-grade-boring photo sets of both. While we’ve been told repeatedly that Atlantis was the floating
bathhouse and RSVP was the queeny piano-bar-on-the-sea, we didn’t see
much difference in the people we talked to.

Worst Products: Ese on Down the Road, Anal Edition


What flavored balm goes on smooth and keeps the mustiest puckers fresh as a teenager? If you answered Anal-Ese, well, son, you’re one hell of a
professional. Today as part of our Worst Products Marketed to the Gays series, we feature this desensitizing agent long used on porn sets to keep the loosest goose from squealing after a three-hour Arpad-Miklos pounding. Generally, the benzocaine confection has been marketed to women trying to get over the hump, so to speak. As gays scoop up more products marketed to women (Special K, Juicy Couture, Enchanted), it gets harder to believe that any woman (or alternately, the man who wants to pop her in the pooper) is gonna care that her thumping hole is flavored like a maraschino. Of course, we’re not really sure that a guy who’s numbing himself for a three-day party is at the top of our menu, either… but we digress.

Frat House

440 Castro

San Francisco


Come get it on at the Bar Formerly Known as Daddy’s with a truckload of straight-acting twinks and the gayer gays who love them. 

Bear Pride Week


Cologne (Koln)

November 20-25

In the States the bears have pride fests all over: in Provincetown, in Chicago, in San Francisco with the Hairrison Street Fair and they’ll always have Guerneville…

Will Clark’s Porno Bingo

WillClarkPornoTHUMB.jpg9th Avenue Bistro
693 9th Ave/48th
New York

Wednesdays 9PM – 11PM

NYC porn stars and others who happen to be passing through town between penetrations…



HK Lounge
523 9th Ave @ 39th
New York


HK Lounge is still coming into its own, but Hell’s Kitchen is where it’s at…

Tubesteak Connection


Aunt Charlie’s Lounge
133 Turk Street

Thursdays, 10PM – 2AM

Aunt Charlie’s is one of our favorite bars of all time.  The carpet probably hasn’t been replaced since the mid-70s…

San Francisco’s Finest Gay Dives

AuntCharlies.jpg Aunt Charlie’s Lounge


133 Turk Street


The carpet probably hasn’t been replaced since the mid-70s, there’s one of those flammable-stuffed-animal crane games up front, and Anthony the toothless bartender is the sweetest thing to happen to the Tenderloin since the advent of crack. Don’t miss the Hot Boxxx Girls, Fri-Sat 10 PM.



GingersTrois2.jpg Ginger’s Trois


246 Kearny Street


Though Damron Guides cite a “professional crowd” and a recent makeover and change of ownership has brightened up the inside a bit, our experience of Ginger’s leans more toward wheelchairs and Cutty Sark neat on a Tuesday afternoon. Not exactly a late-night destination, but a good bet for a gayische happy hour crowd replete with bobo financiers and retail queens.



HoleinWall.jpg Hole in the Wall Saloon


1369 Folsom Street


Expect a selection of leather daddies and pool-hustling cubs at this Harley-friendly dive recently relocated to Folsom Street.  It opens at noon and it’s about bottled beer and hankies around here, so don’t even think about ordering a fucking Cosmo. Also, the occasional patron craps outside the door for our viewing pleasure.



gangway2.jpg Gangway

Polk Gulch

841 Larkin Street


The bandana’d and rolled-jeans bicycle crew takes the place over twice a month at Chrome and Manquake, but most nights the Gangway is the sort place where old guys have slurred shout-fights about the names of Elizabeth Taylor’s husbands and who got more tail during the war.


The Men’s Room
3988 18th Street

It’s a bit like a ski lodge in this tiny joint on 18th, complete with 60s canister fireplace in the back corner, and it’s perfect for a weeknight birthday because you and your friends can basically take over the place and own the jukebox, which isn’t half bad.  Also, a nice escape from the usual shitshow up the street on a Saturday night–the kind of place you can watch a closed-captioned PBS on Broadway special while sipping some Scotch and working through a breakup.



Cool Bars in NYC

505 E. 6th Street

The music’s good, the boys are hip, the bartenders are cute and it’s the kind of non-BnT, come-as-you-are booze fest Manhattan needs more of.  But we admit we also love it partly because of fond memories the old, seedy Wonder Bar at the same address, with the blackout back room and $2 beers and John Waters movies and projected on the back wall. Check out Bloc Party on Fridays.

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The Ritz



369 W. 46th Street

This swank new midtown space with outdoor patios and a nautical theme got voted Best New Venue by HX in 2007, and has enough parties going on that it’ll keep you oscillating between buzzed and hungover through your entire work week.


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HK Lounge
523 9th Avenue

HK Lounge just is still coming into its own, but Hell’s Kitchen is where it’s at and the space is airy and well designed. The boys tend to be cute, the music more hip than not, and the crowd a mix of professionals and performers from the neighborhood.  If you’re in the ‘hood on Thursdays and you’re not swilling late-night happy hour drinks at Barrage, check out Buzz.

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The Cock
29 2nd Avenue

The East Village was ahead of the curve in bringing sleaze back to gay life in the late 90s, and the Cock was at the forefront of that movement. Then the place got more popular and moved to the Hole, but it’s still a really easy answer to the question “where can I get drunk and laid with the most efficiency tonight in Manhattan?”  Check out Cock Fight on Saturdays.
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Booty Call


The Bar on Castro
456 Castro Street
San Francisco

Every Wednesday, 9PM – 2AM

At a time when gay nightlife in SF has reached a particularly low ebb-tide, Juanita MORE! and the MOREboys can always be counted on to bring out the cuties and cool kids at this mid-week dance party.

Latin Fever

Thumbnail image for latinfever10.jpg

Oscars, Rio Cuale
Puerto Vallarta, Mexico

November 21-26

In case you’re closer to Puerto Vallarta than you are to Miami, and if you like your men with a little more Latin in their blood  then you may want to opt for this other White Party over the Thanksgiving weekend.  Gays don’t have families, right?  Who gives a fuck about Thanksgiving?  Tis the season for getting freaky with your bois and jumping up and down to some house music, dude.  DJs Cary Stringfellow (LA), Oscar Velazquez, and Ramses will be joined by drag diva Lady Bunny and international club diva Sofonda Fox. http://www.willgorges.com/






Bangkok Pride Week


Bangkok, Thailand

November 3-11

Unlike the decadent and enormous fag fests we’re used to in our more cosmopolitan Blue States, places like Bangkok are still ringing in Pride for political reasons.  If you’re in the neighborhood, check out how proud the tranny hookers and dykes and ladyboys of Bangkok can be, complete with elaborate gold crowns and reluctant police protection.  http://www.pridefestival.org/












Gucci Store Opening


New Delhi, India

Tom Ford gets around, and so does the label that made him famous.  Gucci recently opened their first India boutique in Mumbai, and is slated to open their second in New Delhi by year’s end.  Expect the recently wealthy technocrats of New Delhi to embrace the expensive fashions, but we’re not sure how well the leather goods will go over with the Hindus.










Bear Pride Week


Various Venues
Cologne, Germany

November 20-25

In the States the bears have pride fests all over: in Provincetown, in Chicago, in San Francisco with the Hairrison Street Fair, and they’ll always have Guerneville.  Each November in Germany, the hairier Deutsches head to Cologne for Bartmanner Koln to revel in each others’ non-conformist, unpretty, oftimes smelly, beer-loving ways.  This year’s fest includes a Butch & Bear Disco Night and a poster modeled after Rocky Horror, renamed the Hairy Horror Picture Show. More info at www.bearscologne.de















Paris Gay & Lesbian Film Festival


Various Venues
Paris, France

November 13-20

This fest has been around since 1994, showcasing independent films by and for a European lesbigay audience, many of which never find wide distribution.  The opening film this year, “XXY” by Lucia Puenzo, was an official selection at Cannes, and the closing film is called “Le Roi et le Clown” which sounds like a real winner in our book. 


The White Party at Vizcaya


Villa Vizcaya
Miami, FL

November 21-26

Begun as a fundraiser for an HIV/AIDS service organization in 1985, the White Party has become a ginormous dance party at a huge estate called the Villa Vizcaya in Miami Beach.  Expect the usual tweakers and a lot of Eurofags in white jeans, but also expect drag queens on stilts with white wings, faggots in feathers, and lots and lots of opportunities for groping pecs and having unsafe sex.  As well as safe sex, of course.  http://www.whiteparty.org/







Marcha del Orgullo (Pride Parade)


Plaza de Mayo
Buenos Aires, Argentina

November 17

Don’t cry for her, and don’t keep your distance. The kickoff of gay summer in Argentina is the Pride festival in Buenos Aires, arguably the gay mecca of South America and the spiritual home of all die-hard Patti Lupone fans.  This year Buenos Aires got even gayer with the Gay World Cup happening here in September.  Check out the parade at 6 p.m. on Saturday November 17th, with MCs Daisy May Queen and Osvaldo Bazan. And don’t forget that with the U.S. dollar in the toilet, Argentina is one of the only places you can still drink cheaply.  http://www.marchadelorgullo.org.ar/







Montreal Int’l LGBT Film Festival


Various Venues
Montreal, Canada
November 15-25

It’s cold in Montreal in November, and possibly snowy, but if you’re in that neck of the woods and want a sampling of homo cinema, check out this film fest dubbed “Image + Nation.”  The festival is opening this year with a Spanish entry called “Reinas” (“Queens”) by Manuel Gomez Pereira and starring two Almodovar faithfuls, Carmen Maura and Marisa Paredes.  Check out the website for more info. www.image-nation.org









Another Reason We’re Glad We’re Not Straight


We realize that MSNBC is desperate for “quirky news” items to break up the monotony of stock market reports and Iraq death tolls, but… cuddle parties? A sleepover without sex or Dirty Dancing?  It’s nice to be reminded (albeit by six-month-old Newsweek piece about a two-year-old non-trend) that our straight counterparts not only have to endure things like sports bars and vaginal sex, but also invites to events with no booze and “space to reframe assumptions about men and women.” Fun! No wonder they have kids. As for us, we’re lubed and ready in Room 210.


While We Enjoy a Good Spooning… (Guest of a Guest)

Cuddle My World (MSNBC via Newsweek)

Are Sales That Bad at Tom Ford Menswear?

TomFordThumb.jpgOUT Magazine may have divorced itself corporately from its not-fit-for-the-gay-coffee-table Liberation Publications siblings (Men, Freshmen, Unzipped), but that doesn’t mean it’s given up the skin-mag ghost. In the November issue, celebrity chest-hair-sporter Tom Ford unbuttoned more than just his shirt, appearing buck naked in a photo shoot with two actual models.


Full ass shot after the jump…



The Sword Guide to Gay Party Drugs: Installment 1, Poppers

poppers.jpg The mustachioed granddaddy of back-alley fag enhancers, “poppers” is the name given to any number of alkyl or amyl nitrates found these days in little bottles labeled as “room odorisor” or “VCR head cleaner” with brand names like “Rush” and “BANG!!” and “Jungle Juice.”  The drug was originally a treatment for angina, and got its street name from being sold in small glass ampules that made a popping sound when they were crushed to release their vapors.  Once blamed for the ‘gay virus’ that appeared in 1981 (they now think that was something else), poppers are still said to cause temporary weakening of the immune system. After the jump, our complete field guide.



The Transfer
198 Church Street
San Francisco
Tuesdays 9PM to 2AM

Though we do love Trannyshack, the place has its off-weeks.  Try the Transfer as an alternative…

Manic Mondays


Bar on Castro
456 Castro Street
San Francisco

Mondays, 8PM – 2AM

When you offer 80-cent well drinks, expect the kids to show up in droves, even if it is a Monday night.  

Cuckoo Club


Hiro Ballroom
363 W 16th Street
New York

Sundays 9PM – 4AM

It’s getting a little bit mobbed after midnight at this weekly fete, but given that Sundays are for drinking



85 Campton Place
San Francisco

3rd Sundays, 6PM

Vessel is pretty pricey, the kind of old school velvet rope joint, located behind Nike Town…

Cock Fight


The Cock
29 2nd Ave
New York

Every Saturday

The East Village was ahead of the curve in bringing the dirtiness back to gay life in the late 90s


550 Barnveld
San Francisco

Saturday, November 10

DJ Manny Lehman spins at this big old homo ho-down

Trans Am

Club 8
1151 Folsom Street

San Francisco

1st Saturdays 10PM – 2AM

When you’re as tired of hearing Janet remixes as we are, you might
want to head to this monthly party at Club 8, where the music tends
more to the punk and rock end of the spectrum.

The Rod


Deco Lounge
510 Larkin Street
San Francisco

2nd Fridays 10PM – 2AM

Once a month, the more dingily denimed and Converse shoe’d 

Bloc Party


505 E 6th Street
New York

Every Friday

This is one of our favorite gay bars in New York: the music’s good, the boys are hip, the bartenders are cute and it’s the kind of come-as-you-are, non-BnT booze fest Manhattan needs more of.

Boy Bar


The Café
2367 Market Street
San Francisco

Every Friday 9PM – 2AM

If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to feel old before your time, washed up by age 28…

Feel White

BT59, Sites de Terre Neuves, Rue Marc Sagnier, Begles.


November 3, 2007

A Frenchier sort of White Party which bills itself as defined by deux mots (actually trois) “SMILE and HAPPY HOUSE.”  The more southern Gallic gays, in response to the lack of big parties in their neck of the woods, flock to this party in the Bordeaux suburb of Begles to whip off their shirts and–excuse our lackluster translation skills–“to feel, at the same time, the feet in Paris and the head in Barcelona.”  We’re sure it’s just like a night in Miami except way fewer Cubans and presided over by “la belle, la fabuleuse, la merveilleuse, l’incomparable… Mademoiselle Lucy,” who’s apparently a wicked big DJ over there. The action starts at 11 p.m. http://www.feel-detergent.com/

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