Sword Says

You ever heard of the Pink Pistols? We bet Natasha Latrice Atkins has. Natasha is a city employee in Houston, working for the Department of Public Works, and in response to some (alleged) homophobic harassment from a coworker, Atkins brought a gun to work one day and shot the guy. He’s still alive, and Monroe Haggart, Atkins’ father, says the shooting followed a series of remarks by the victim, Dave Whitfield Jr., who apparently had a problem with lesbians working for the city.

Didn’t your mother tell you not to believe everything you read on the internet? It seems that much of the non-fact-checking web, ourselves included, were hoodwinked last week about a certain “survey” done for a certain porn concern by an “independent internet market research company” that said that some 30% of new memberships were the result of people spending their economic stimulus checks.  While it makes perfect sense that people might spend a portion of their newfound disposable income on porn, booze, hookers and the like, we are as guilty as the New York Post, Valleywag and others for not looking a little further into these claims.  As suggested by AVN’s Tom Johansmeyer, Adult Internet Market Research Company, or AIMRCo, turns out to likely be a fictional entity, founded only about a month ago, and probably by the owners of low-rent straight porn sites LSGModels.com and MoreyStudio.com to drive traffic to their sites.

Noted racist, homophobe, former U.S. Senator and self-described “redneck” Jesse Helms finally died this past Friday, in the wee hours of our great nation’s Independence Day.  We called this one back in February, but the stubborn old bastard hung on for a few months just so he could have the satisfaction of getting that July 4th date on his gravestone.  (Here’s hoping Andres Serrano makes a pilgrimage down to wherever he’s buried, to piss on it.)

Helms bitterly fought against federal funding for AIDS research and treatment, claiming the disease resulted from “disgusting” and “unnatural” behavior. And he single-handedly caused the ruckus over the National Endowment for the Arts in the late 80s when he held Congressional hearings to protest funds going to artists such as Robert Mapplethorpe and Serrano, whose “Piss Christ” became a conservative rallying point against funding for the arts.

They always say porn and alcohol are recession-proof industries… and Valleywag is reporting today that an independent market-research firm went to work surveying new customers of a straight porn site (LSGModels.com — Warning! Tits! Also, NSFW!) this past month, and 32% of these customers said they purchased memberships in part due to their Economic Stimulus Package checks. The site has in fact seen 20-30% growth in memberships since May. Congress and the Bushies probably should have known better than to think people were going to spend an extra $600 bucks on food and domestic tourism. We spent ours on absinthe, credit card debt and tips shoved in the shorts of a particularly hot go-go boy last weekend. (Luv ya, Greg. Call us.) Feel free to spend some of yours here!

In a scene worthy of a B-side Dolly Parton song, a 21-year-old gay man who had admitted to previously sleeping with a woman woke to a “searing pain and disturbing wetness,” then watched as his male lover flushed his severed penis down the toilet. The offending organ has not been recovered, and in typical male fashion we’re having trouble recovering from even the idea of this.

We’re sorry we missed this in all the pre-Pride madness last week, and we’re willing to give old Al the benefit of the doubt, but it seems Al Sharpton, appearing on Anderson Cooper 360 last week, made a statement about his own liberal religious beliefs that could be interpreted as him trying to out Anderson on the air.  He said, and we quote, “I may have some very conservative personal feelings, but I feel you have the right to live your life differently. I may think that what you do Anderson is gonna put you in Hell, but I’m gonna defend your right to get there.”  Everyone laughed and someone else on the show said something about wanting to keep Anderson from going to hell, but then the gay webs were abuzz! over the incident.  We personally think it was just Al throwing in an extra “Anderson” into a sentence that was making a more rhetorical statement to a general “you,” meaning that he defends the rights of any individual to be a sinner. But sure, you could read it however you like, and Al’s old, and Anderson’s gay, and maybe Al didn’t realize that it’s like this whole open secret thing that Anderson likes dick and he wasn’t supposed to be mentioning it.  Anyway, the full clip, after the jump.

We’ve had our fill of swell and swilling Pride, but for some global gays it’s still about fighting for, like, civil rights! This weekend not only marked the anniversary of Stonewall in the U.S., it marked Queer Pride in India, with a parade in Calcutta and the first celebrations of their kind in Delhi and Bangalore. The freedom to be out in the open about one’s gayness hasn’t really existed in India due to a colonial area penal code known as Section 377 that punishes for sex acts “against the order of nature.” The law has been repealed in other former British colonies and a high court in Delhi is set to hear arguments against the law this week.

Sorry to ruin your Thursday weekend kickoff buzz, but the CDC (via Queerty) reports that across 33 states, new HIV diagnoses rose as high as 15 percent per year between 2001 and 2006 among gay and bi men aged 13 to 24. Despite the lack of clarity surrounding some figures released earlier this year in regard to new diagnoses, these new figures do indicate that a) the Bush Administration’s abstinence-only policy toward sex education is doing a fuck lot of good, especially for Black and Latino teens, and that b) the whole bareback fetish/idiocy is not helping matters either.

Organizers of a Cuban Gay Pride March that was scheduled to happen today in Havana were allegedly arrested and beaten by Cuban police before the march could begin, according to Ambiente Magazine. The march, the first of its kind in Cuba, was planned to begin this morning at 10 AM at Don Quixote park and proceed to the Ministry of Justice, more as a formal protest for mistreatment of sexual minorities under the rule of Fidel Castro than as a celebration. Raul Castro’s daughter, Mariela Castro, has recently been influential in heading the nation’s Center for Sex Education and in leading a public rally against homophobia.

Have you heard of the Gill Action Fund? Neither had we. But this month’s Advocate has a cover story about this semi-secretive, pro-gay political action committee founded by self-made millionaire Tim Gill, creator of Quark design software. The fund is directed by Patrick Guerriero and Bill Smith and seems to be modeled on Newt Gingrich’s GOPAC which was used in the 1994 mid-term elections to win Republican majorities in the House and Senate. Guerriero and Smith both have Republican backgrounds, working with the Log Cabin Republicans and Karl Rove himself, and now they’re using the dirty tactics of the GOP to bring down anti-gay candidates for state offices of both parties.

Don’t go writing us any letters. We have nothing to prove that Kate Moss flies in airplanes or goes through customs with cocaine.  But it does seem highly unfair that U.S. Customs should deny Boy George a visa just as he was attempting to return to the States for an upcoming tour and to give a free concert to the NY Department of Sanitation (with whom he performed his community service for his 2006 bust for cocaine possession). Poor fella! Just as he trying to pull his shit together and writing a cheesy dance ballad in support of Barack Obama!

Wishful thinking on our part, but anyway, we know it’s a huge legal landmark and blah blah. For lack of any other notable news on the gay front, here’s another not-so-breathless gay marriage news roundup from around the blogosphere.

We begin with the announcement that perpetually tedious AfterElton vloggers “Two Gay Guys,” Brent Hartinger and Michael Jensen, are coming to Cali to get married in July. And guess what?! They promise to bring their camcorder! We can’t fucking wait. (Editor’s Note: The Sword exists to offer sweet relief from such mind-melting mediocrity to all those of you with a sense of humor, a penis, and teaspoon of taste. No offense. And what the fuck are they drinking in that video, Midori sours? Christ.)